taph: The Bills Men Introduced Live After Them.

PARSIFAL, the longest-winded singer who ever stepped on an opera stage.

PASTEUR, Doctor, discoverer. Experimented with mad dogs until he came to
the conclusion they should be shot or chained. A subway station in Paris
has been named after him.

PATRICK, Saint, a Scotchman who drove all the snakes out of Ireland with
the exception of those in bottles. Also introduced the brogue and the
shamrock into the Emerald Isle.

PAT, also of Ireland. At an early age he emigrated to the United States.
There he took up the hod-carrying business. Went on the stage and set
the world laughing. He also entered politics, captured the American
police force, and, together with his brothers in Parliament, rules Great
Britain and the United States.

PATTI, Adelina, a singer who said au revoir but not good bye. Epitaph:
Cum Grano Salis.

PEAR,(8) the man who names most of the London busses, and keeps
the people of England clean for a penny a week. His business is
international with the exception of Glasgow and Italy.

(8) Ed. Note: This is not an advertisement. The editor does not use
soap.

PEARY, Captain Robert E., explorer who said he reached the north pole
and convinced a few people. Was also forced to write a book and lecture.
Publications: How Dr. Cook Almost Got Ahead of Me. Ambition: That a
certain man had not made him get all the way there the last time. Grave:
The Cook incident.

PENN, William, a man whose picture appears on all Quaker Oats boxes. An
Englishman who left his country, bought Pennsylvania, built the slow,
old town of Philadelphia, and hung up the American Liberty Bell.

PERICLES, of Athens. Political boss, philosopher, and general. Secured
his reputation through brains, a voice, and a well-oiled political
machine. Started the golden age of Greece with a loud blast of the horn
of plenty.

PETER, no relation to the following. He introduced the art of chocolate
making into Switzerland, and the art of eating it into America.
Ambition: More children and people with sweet teeth.

PETER, Saint, a fine old bearded saint who is an excellent bookkeeper,
and a detester of roosters. A church in Rome has taken his name.
Ambition: A new key. Recreation: Oiling hinges. Address: Golden gates.

PHARAOH, of Egypt. Benefactor of Moses and Joseph. Was also the father
of Pharaoh's daughter. Built a few pyramids, cigarette factories, and
made a handsome mummy.

PHILIP II,