be rich]: as when the courser whirls along the chariot
dismissed from the place of starting; the charioteer presses upon those
horses which outstrip his own, despising him that is left behind coming
on among the last. Hence it is, that we rarely find a man who can say he
has lived happy, and content with his past life, can retire from the
world like a satisfied guest. Enough for the present: nor will I add one
word more, lest you should suspect that I have plundered the escrutoire
of the blear-eyed Crispinus.

* * * * *

SATIRE II.

_Bad men, when they avoid certain vices, fall into their opposite
extremes._

The tribes of female flute-players, quacks, vagrants, mimics,
blackguards; all this set is sorrowful and dejected on account of the
death of the singer Tigellius; for he was liberal [toward them]. On the
other hand, this man, dreading to be called a spendthrift, will not give
a poor friend wherewithal to keep off cold and pinching hunger. If you
ask him why he wickedly consumes the noble estate of his grandfather and
father in tasteless gluttony, buying with borrowed money all sorts of
dainties; he answers, because he is unwilling to be reckoned sordid, or
of a mean spirit: he is praised by some, condemned by others. Fufidius,
wealthy in lands, wealthy in money put out at interest, is afraid of
having the character of a rake and spendthrift. This fellow deducts 5
per cent. Interest from the principal [at the time of lending]; and, the
more desperate in his circumstances any one is, the more severely be
pinches him: he hunts out the names of young fellows that have just put
on the toga virilis under rigid fathers. Who does not cry out, O
sovereign Jupiter! when he has heard [of such knavery]? But [you will
say, perhaps,] this man expends upon himself in proportion to his gain.
You can hardly believe how little a friend he is to himself: insomuch
that the father, whom Terence's comedy introduces as living miserable
after he had caused his son to run away from him, did not torment
himself worse than he. Now if any one should ask, "To what does this
matter tend?" To this: while fools shun [one sort of] vices, they fall
upon their opposite extremes. Malthinus walks with his garments trailing
upon the ground; there is another droll fellow who [goes] with them
tucked up even to his middle; Rufillus smells like perfume itself,
Gorgonius like a he-goat. There is no mean. There are so