e a true poem or not: now I shall only consider this
point, whether this [satiric] kind of writing be deservedly an object of
your suspicion. Sulcius the virulent, and Caprius hoarse with their
malignancy, walk [openly], and with their libels too [in their hands];
each of them a singular terror to robbers: but if a man lives honestly
and with clean hands, he may despise them both. Though you be like
highwaymen, Coelus and Byrrhus, I am not [a common accuser], like
Caprius and Sulcius; why should you be afraid of me? No shop nor stall
holds my books, which the sweaty hands of the vulgar and of Hermogenes
Tigellius may soil. I repeat to nobody, except my intimates, and that
when I am pressed; nor any where, and before any body. There are many
who recite their writings in the middle of the forum; and who [do it]
while bathing: the closeness of the place, [it seems,] gives melody to
the voice. This pleases coxcombs, who never consider whether they do
this to no purpose, or at an unseasonable time. But you, says he,
delight to hurt people, and this you do out of a mischievous
disposition. From what source do you throw this calumny upon me? Is any
one then your voucher, with whom I have lived? He who backbites his
absent friend; [nay more,] who does not defend, at another's accusing
him; who affects to raise loud laughs in company, and the reputation of
a funny fellow, who can feign things he never saw; who cannot keep
secrets; he is a dangerous man: be you, Roman, aware of him. You may
often see it [even in crowded companies], where twelve sup together on
three couches; one of which shall delight at any rate to asperse the
rest, except him who furnishes the bath; and him too afterward in his
liquor, when truth-telling Bacchus opens the secrets of his heart. Yet
this man seems entertaining, and well-bred, and frank to you, who are an
enemy to the malignant: but do I, if I have laughed because the fop
Rufillus smells all perfumes, and Gorgonius, like a he-goat, appear
insidious and a snarler to you? If by any means mention happen to be
made of the thefts of Petillius Capitolinus in your company, you defend
him after your manner: [as thus,] Capitolinus has had me for a companion
and a friend from childhood, and being applied to, has done many things
on my account: and I am glad that he lives secure in the city; but I
wonder, notwithstanding, how he evaded that sentence. This is the very
essence of black malignity, this is mere ma