l ask ourselves. Did anyone
really know the first Jobey, or was there only an ancestral Jobey back
in the days of EDWARD VI.? How old was the dynasty? Was Jobey Levi? Was
Jobey Powell? Was Jobey short and fat? Was Jobey tall and thin? What did
Jobey sell? What did Jobey do?

To begin with, what was the _casus belli_? No one can remember. But some
old Etonian, reminiscing, had the effrontery to believe that the Jobey
to whom, in his anecdotage, he referred, who sold oranges at the gate or
blew up footballs or performed other jobicular functions, was the only
Jobey. That was enough. Instantly in poured other infuriated old
Etonians, also in anecdotage, to pit their memories against his.
Everything was forgotten in the struggle: the KAISER'S illness, Sir IAN
HAMILTON'S despatch, the Compulsion Bill, the Quakers and their
consciences, the deficiencies of the Blockade. Nothing existed but
Jobey.

All the letters, however, were not printed, and some of those that
escaped _The Times_ have fallen into our own hand. We give one or two:--

Sir,--Your Correspondents are wrong. Jobey was a fat red man,
with a purple nose and a wooden leg.

I am, Yours faithfully, NESTOR.

Sir,--My recollection of Jobey is exact. He was a fat man with a
hook instead of a left hand, and he stood at least six feet six
inches high. No one could mistake him.

I am, Obediently yours,

METHUSELAH PARR.

Sir,--JOWETT, though not an Etonian himself, was greatly
interested in anecdotes of Jobey related to him by Etonian
undergraduates in the "sixties," and on one occasion, when he
was the guest of the Headmaster, he was introduced to the famous
factotum, who instructed him in the art of blowing up footballs,
and presented him with a blood orange, which JOWETT religiously
preserved for many years in a glass-case in his study. In
features they were curiously alike, but Jobey's nose was larger
and far redder than that of the Master's. I have given a fuller
account of the interview in my _Balliol Memories_, Vol. iii.,
pp. 292-5, but may content myself with saying here that the two
eminent men parted with mutual respect.

I am, Sir, Yours faithfully,

LEMUEL LONGMIRE.

Sir,--I wish to point out that "My Tutor's" is hopelessly wrong
in thinking that his Jobey is the real Jobey. Looking through my
diary for June, 1815, I find this entry:--