INK!"]

* * * * *

THE HAT-MOVING TRICK.

[Illustration: F]

For some time past we have seen in the country papers that a great many
parties have been given for the purpose of trying the hat-moving
experiment. We are not at all disposed to quarrel with the fact, for we
are decidedly of a social turn ourselves, and we rejoice to find that
party-spirit is so favourably progressing. But the experiment is so
certain to be introduced at parties, that we cannot say we see the use
of giving them expressly for the purpose of its trial. The motion may in
fact be legally regarded as a "motion of course:" as inseparable from a
party as white kid gloves and flirting. We would simply put it to the
reader, whether, in the whole course of his social experience, he ever
recollects being present at a party where, by the time he went away, his
hat was not "moved" from the peg on which he hung it. For ourselves,
indeed, we may confidently assert that at 99 at least out of a 100
"squeezes" we have attended this season, our hat has been so severely
"operated upon" in our absence from the cloak-room, that we have
scarcely had an inch of brim left us to walk home in. In fact, on more
than one occasion, the operators have so far succeeded in their "moving"
as to have moved it altogether off the premises by the time we wanted
it: but this has only happened, we believe, when by some unlucky
accident we have so far forgot ourselves as to have brought a new one.

* * * * *

ADVICE TO GABBLING M.P.'S.--When you resolve upon making a speech, copy
the cook who, preparing a sheep's head, never dishes up the tongue
without the brains.

* * * * *

WHAT IS THE HOUSE OF KEYS?

The _Court Circular_ tells us that a deputation from "the House of Keys"
had an interview with one of the official somebodies or nobodies at
Downing Street the other day, and MR. WILSON, M.P., told the House of
Commons the other evening that he had a series of resolutions by "the
House of Keys" in his possession. After some research we find that "the
House of Keys" is something or other in the Isle of Man, answering
probably to the vestry of a parish, the beadledom of an arcade, or some
other small local authority.

We should like to be present at a debate among "the Keys," for we are
curious to know whether they allude to each other as the "Honourable
Member for Street Door," "