our neckcloth." The witness'
presence of mind was gone, and he was made to unsay the greatest part of
his evidence in chief. Another witness confounding 'thick' whalebone
with 'long' whalebone, and unable to distinguish the difference after
counsel's explanation, Erskine exclaimed, "Why, man, you do not seem to
know the difference between what is _thick_ or what is _long_! Now I
tell you the difference. You are _thick_-headed, and you are not
_long_-headed."

Lord Erskine's addiction to punning is well known, and many examples
might be cited. An action was brought against a stable-keeper for not
taking proper care of a horse. "The horse," said counsel for the
plaintiff, "was turned into the stable, with nothing to eat but musty
hay. To such the horse 'demurred.'"--"He should have 'gone to the
country,'" at once retorted Lord Erskine. For the general reader it
should be explained that "demurring" and "going to the country" are
technical terms for requiring a cause to be decided on a question of law
by the judge, or on a question of fact by the jury. Here is another. A
low-class attorney who was much employed in bail-business and moving
attachments against the sheriff for not "bringing in the body"--that is,
not arresting and imprisoning a debtor, when such was the law--sold his
house in Lincoln's Inn Fields to the Corporation, of Surgeons to be used
as their Hall. "I suppose it was recommended to them," said Erskine,
"from the attorney being so well acquainted 'with the practice of
bringing in the body!'"

Perhaps one of his smartest puns he relates himself. "A case being laid
before me by my veteran friend, the Duke of Queensberry--better known as
'old Q'--as to whether he could sue a tradesman for breach of contract
about the painting of his house; and the evidence being totally
insufficient to support the case, I wrote thus: 'I am of opinion that
this action will not lie unless the witnesses do.'"

He was also fond of a practical joke. In answer to a circular letter
from Sir John Sinclair, proposing that a testimonial should be presented
to himself for his eminent public services, Lord Erskine replied:

"MY DEAR SIR JOHN,--I am certain there are few in this kingdom
who set a higher value on your public services than myself;
and I have the honour to subscribe"--then, on turning over the
leaf, was to be found--"myself, your most obedient faithful
servant,

"ERSKINE."

"Gentlemen of