ney-moon. Then I maid her promis
faithfully that she wouldnt tell a sole bout the fortune & manshun, cos
the Edittur of the _Buster_ was the maudestest man in New York city.

The Jesuites used to say that "The end alwus justerfies the meens." Sum
of the old Rode Ileland Purytans may say I'm a liar, but I don't agree
with em, cos I've maid too peepel happy. Samanthy Longtung is radient,
cos she walked up the strete like she was tredin on air. And Mr. Gilley
acts like he'd unloded a hull team full of pig led oflfen his mind, cos
he knoes Samanthy'll have the noose of the fortune all over town 'fore
nite, and then he'll be abel to stave off his bills, and run his cheek
for wotever he warnts, for a hull yare to cum. He told me, wen I was
cummin home, that I was a born diplermatist, & ort to hire myself out to
King Alfonso, of Spain, in case he'd get insulted agin.

CHAPTER XIII.

TRAVERLIN IN STILE.--GRAND RECEPSHUNS AND BABY KISSIN
MATTYNAYS.--MISTAKEN FOR HIS AXERDENSY.--A DEDLEY STATE.

6 p. m., Troy, N. Y.

Mr. Diry:

You will notis by the above address, that you and me are away from home
to-nite, and I spose you orter have sum xplenashun of our doins. Well,
wen I got down to the offis this mornin, Mr. Gilley told me to go rite
home and put on my Sunday cloes, and be reddy to start for Troy on the
leven clock trane, cos we was goin to opin up the campane there, and he
wanted me to carry his sachell, wot had a demmy-John in. Wen I got
back, Gilley was orful busy with a old pall-bearer of the Demmercratick
corpse, from Shodack, fixin the rate per caperta wot was to be bid for
votes.

Wen we got to the depot, Vanderbuilt had had one of his spells, and had
been sendin the publick to Haydies, so he wuldn't let the trane wate ten
minnits for a guvmentel candy date. Mr. Gilley was in an orful way bout
gettin left, cos he had to be at Troy to-nite, and there warnt no other
trane wot would get us there, so he pade a feerful big pile of munney
for a speshell. President Arthur, and a lot of other Republercan dudes
was goin to start for Bufflo on a fishin xcurshun at 1 o'clock, so our
train got under way rite off, and every other trane on the rode was
sidetracked to let us get past.

There was a norful crowd at every sta-shun, wot had cum from miles
round, to see us distingushed cityzens. We stopped at Yungkurs to water.
The town has got a orful apropriate name, judgin by the way the mothers
brot ther yung