HILOSOPHY MASTER: Do you want only prose?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, I don't want either prose or verse.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: It must be one or the other.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Why?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Because, sir, there is no other way to express
oneself than with prose or verse.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: There is nothing but prose or verse?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: No, sir, everything that is not prose is verse,
and everything that is not verse is prose.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: And when one speaks, what is that then?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Prose.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: What! When I say, "Nicole, bring me my slippers,
and give me my nightcap," that's prose?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Yes, Sir.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: By my faith! For more than forty years I have
been speaking prose without knowing anything about it, and I am
much obliged to you for having taught me that. I would like then to
put into a note to her: "Beautiful marchioness, your lovely eyes
make me die of love," but I want that put in a gallant manner and
be nicely turned.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Put it that the fires of her eyes reduce your
heart to cinders; that you suffer night and day for her the
torments of a...
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, no, no. I want none of that; I only want you
to say "Beautiful marchioness, your lovely eyes make me die of
love."
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: The thing requires a little lengthening.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: No, I tell you, I want only those words in the
note, but turned stylishly, well arranged, as is necessary. Please
tell me, just to see, the diverse ways they could be put.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: One could put them first of all as you said
them: "Beautiful marchioness, your lovely eyes make me die of
love." Or else: "Of love to die make me, beautiful marchioness,
your beautiful eyes." Or else: "Your lovely eyes, of love make me,
beautiful marchioness, die." Or else: "Die, your lovely eyes,
beautiful marchioness, of love make me." Or else: "Me make your
lovely eyes die, beautiful marchioness, of love."
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: But, of all those ways, which is the best?
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: The way you said it: "Beautiful marchioness,
your lovely eyes make me die of love."
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I never studied, and yet I made the whole thing
up at the first try. I thank you with all my heart, and I ask you
to come tomorrow early.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: I shall not fail to do so. (He leaves).
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: What? Hasn't my suit come yet?
THE LACKEY
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