s.

* * * * *

A COMPLICATED CASE.--The careless little boy who caught a cold from
his cousin, caught it hot from his mother afterwards.

* * * * *

VENICE IN LONDON.

(_BY A MOSQUITO "OUT OF IT."_)

[Illustration]

Oh, it's all very fine, Mr. IMRE KARALFY,
Thus to blazon your "Venice in London" around,
To portray the Piazzetta for 'ARRY and ALFY,
But dispense with my tintinnabulary sound.
Ask the Tourist if, reft of my wee fellow-creatures,
On the face of the waters (and watermen) blown,
He can honestly recognise Venice's features
In their miniature--or, for that matter, _his own_.

Ever watchful, we guard, Messrs. ALFY and 'ARRY,
With our trumpet and spear for the Doges, their mute,
Opalescent, profanity-proof sanctuary,
And we swell the lagoon--and lagoonster, to boot.
Stare away at this pageant of eld--ever new 'tis,--
In the glimmering gondolas loll, if you like;
But I'll warrant one eye would be closed to their beauties,
Could I only escape for a second on strike.

Could I quiver concealed by yon mimic Rialto,
Till I swooped with a warrior's music and swing,
Were I only allowed, as I ought, and I shall, to
Be avenged on your barbarous hordes with my sting.
I would tilt at the fogs that mock Italy's glory,
I would pounce on the rabble--an insolent fry;--
With my forefathers' motto, "_Pro Patria mori_,"
I'd annihilate ALFY and 'ARRY--and die!

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

[Illustration]

_The Real Japan_ is the title modestly given by Mr. HENRY NORMAN to
his book published by FISHER UNWIN. This, my "CO." remarks, seems to
imply that all the rest (including the lady BIRD's not unknown work)
is, as the Gentleman in trouble, who wanted to secure the advocacy
of _Mr. Jaggers_, said, "cagmagger." This tone of bumptiousness
is occasionally apparent in passages of the book, and is perhaps
sufficiently explained by the circumstance, mentioned in the preface,
that a number of the papers originally appeared in the _Pall
Mall Gazette_. Foible apart, HENRY the Norman has contributed an
interesting chapter to the history of a singularly attractive people.
There is nothing new in the heavier parts, which smell vilely of Blue
Books, and might as well have been written in Northumberland Street
as in Yokohama. HENRY is best in the glimpses he gi