th Sea Islanders, when greeting friends, says _Tit Bits_, fling a jar
of water over them. Cats on night duty are now putting a kindlier
interpretation on the treatment they receive.

* * *

An employee at a coal-mine in Ohio is reported to have died from
overwork. There is consolation in the fact that this could not possibly
happen in England.

* * *

Three Glasgow workmen have started on a walk to London. With the
possibility of a vote in favour of a dry Scotland we suppose they
started early to avoid the rush.

* * *

It is still very doubtful whether JACK DEMPSEY can meet JESS WILLARD,
says a sporting paper. A dear old lady thinks he might get over the
difficulty by dropping him a letter.

* * *

It is reported that the captain of a village fire brigade recently
declined to call his men out to a fire because it was raining.
Unfortunately the owner of the fire was too busy to keep it going till
the first fine day.

* * *

A clerk employed behind the counter at a post-office in the South of
England recently rescued a young girl from drowning. In order to show
their appreciation of the young man's bravery, local residents have now
decided to purchase their stamps at his post-office.

* * *

"Life is uncertain and often full of trouble," bewails a writer in the
"Picture" Press. Still, in our opinion it's the only thing worth living.

* * *

On two separate occasions last week a cat entered one of the largest
churches in Yorkshire whilst a wedding was in progress. This supports
our belief that feline society is contemplating the introduction of more
ceremony into their own marriage system.

* * *

Ex-sailors on the reserve need not be alarmed by the repeated rumours
that a surprise mobilisation of the Fleet may be ordered very shortly,
as we now have it on good authority that, in order to ensure its
complete success, plenty of notice will be given to them beforehand.

* * *

Women are said to be fonder than men are of morbid stage plays. Weddings
also have a greater fascination for them.

* * *

Mr. T. A. EDISON is reported to have invented a machine to record
communication with the other world. As a final experiment an attempt is
to be made to get into touch with the POET LAUREATE.

* * *

The motor-car of polished steel and no paint-work is the latest
innovation. It is said that this will do away with the objecti