eart at _your_ feet he has placed,
That in one thing at least he is showing
A wholly impeccable taste.

* * * * *

How Some Advertisers "Tell the Tale."

"We spin the yarn ourselves."

_Advt. in Daily Paper._

* * * * *

"'FULL TERM.'"

AN IMPRESSION AT CAMBRIDGE.

I watch the faces of the 'men,' boys in so many cases, jumping from
their trains; from the north, the south, the east, the west they
come, and they come not alone but _dona ferentes_--they carry
tennis-racquets, golf-sticks, cycles, sidecars, kitbags,
gladstone-bags, trunks, hold-alls."--_Evening Paper._

Hefty chaps, these post-war undergraduates.

* * * * *

"Question.--How much has the time for crossing the ocean been
shortened since the day of Columbus?

T. E. C.

Answer.--Idaho is a North American Indian word meaning 'Gem of the
Mountains' or 'Sunrise Mountains.'"

_Boston (Massachusetts) Herald._

We hope that T. E. C. isn't going to be put off with such a simple
device as this.

* * * * *

Illustration: _Injured Party._ "IT'S ALL VERY WELL, PASSON, FOR YOU TO
SAY WOT 'ORRIBLE LANGWIDGE, BUT 'APPEN YOUR MISSIS AIN'T SUCH A GOOD
SHOT WITH A FLAT-IRON AS MINE IS."

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)

There is certainly this to be said of Mr. HUGH WALPOLE--that, having
devised a tale of gloom, he allows no weak consideration for his
readers' feelings to deter him from making the worst of it. I write,
having but now emerged, blinking a little at the familiar sunlight (yet
oddly invigorated too), from a perusal of the four-hundred-and-seventy
pages of his _Captives_ (MACMILLAN). Of course I have nothing like space
to detail for you its plot. Summarised, it tells the life of a young
woman, _Maggie Cardinal_, whom one may briefly call the bemused victim
of religions--and relations. You never knew any well-intentioned heroine
who had such abysmal luck with both. Her clergyman father, a bad hat,
who spared us his acquaintance by expiring on the first page; her
semi-moribund aunts in their detestable London home; the circle of the
Inner Saints, with their intrigues that centred in the ugly little
meeting-house; the seaside parish with its spiritually-dead atmosphere,
in which _Maggie'