ion.

* * * * *

=HEART= A bloody organ, kept in a trunk, played by beats, and
enjoyed only after it is lost or given away.

* * * * *

=HEAVE= To raise.

=HEAVEN= A good place to be raised to.

* * * * *

=HEDGE= A fence.

=HEDGEHOG= One who hogs the fences. A Bill-Poster.

* * * * *

=HELL= Poverty.

* * * * *

=HEREDITY= The cause of all our faults. From Fr. _here_, wretch,
and Eng. _ditty_, song. The song of the wretched.

* * * * *

=HEROISM=

[Illustration]

A transferable ticket to the Haul of Fame. Once held by Hobson and
Dewey, now carried by Mother Eddy and Brother Dowie.

* * * * *

=HIP= A popular location for the retail liquor business.

* * * * *

=HISTORY= The evil that men do.

* * * * *

=HIT= A chance for first place, first base or first blood.

* * * * *

=HOCK= v. t. To "soak" what we least need. In Germany, they
generally "Hock the Kaiser."

* * * * *

=HOMOEOPATHY= See Allopathy.

* * * * *

=HOOT MON=! The Scottish National Hymn.

* * * * *

=HOP= To skip.

=HOPPER= A skipper.

* * * * *

=HOPE= A desire for better things to come that makes a grass widow
willing to try it again. Also, a draft on futurity, sometimes
honored, but generally extended.

* * * * *

[Illustration]

=HORN= A sharp point.

=HORNET= Still sharper.

* * * * *

=HORSE-SENSE= A degree of wisdom that keeps one from betting on
the races.

* * * * *

=HOSE= Man's excuse for wetting the walk.

=HOSIERY= Woman's excuse for walking in the wet.

* * * * *

=HOTEL= A place where a guest often gives up good dollars for poor
quarters.

* * * * *

=HOUSECLEANING= A domestic upheaval that makes it easy for the
government to enlist all the soldiers it needs.

* * * *