rench papers, as it
will be, should encourage him and improve his position.
* * *
Dined at Lady RIDLEY'S. A very cheery party and much chaff. Mrs. ASQUITH
said that she was writing her reminiscences. I made no mention of my
diary, but if I don't get it out in book form before hers I'm not the
Colonel of the Nuts.
* * *
To-day's article should bring things to a head very shortly. Shall be
very glad when it is over and I can rest a little. Took some bicarbonate
of soda.
* * *
Armistice signed. Spent the day in a kind of triumphal procession from
restaurant to restaurant, at each of which I was hailed with applause.
* * *
Reached Versailles and let the news be known. A visible quickening up
already to be noted.
* * *
Sent for President WILSON, but something must have prevented his coming.
Lunched at Paillard's and dined at Larue's. Saw an amusing Palais Royal
farce.
* * *
_June 28th_, 1920.--Treaty of Peace, for which I have worked so long,
signed at last. Now I can utter my _Nunc Dimittis_, having accomplished
the two ends I had in view--to bring the first world War to a more or
less satisfactory finish and to make it dangerous for any but the deaf
and dumb to dine out.
E. V. L.
* * * * *
THE LATE WORM
(_Being a correction of "A Ballad of the Early Worm," "Punch," October
6th_).
OH ye whose hearts were rent with pain
A few short weeks ago,
Is it unkind to harp again
Upon that tale of woe?
You know the tale--in _Punch_, I mean--
Pathetic every word;
Three wormlets fought to stand between
Pa and the Early Bird.
You sorrowed for their non-success
(By use of triple strength
They saved their father's life--ah yes--
But not his total length).
You thought, of course--I know you did--
That Father left his hole,
A briskly virtuous annelid,
To take an early stroll.
Well, now just go and read a book
Called _Vegetable Mould
And Earthworms_ (DARWIN); if you look
You'll find that you've been sold.
It's not my own, it's DARWIN'S firm
Authority I cite:
_There never is an early worm;
Pa had been out all night._
He swaggered forth at eventide
And stayed till dawn next day;
For I will not attempt to hide
That _worms behave that way._
So pious folk like you and me
Should not be filled with woe
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