* * *

A Bill has been introduced in the New York Legislature to confine the
headlines in murder cases to thirty-six points. The limit for international
headliners is still fourteen points.

* * *

The Government, says a contemporary, is about to start growing tobacco in
Norfolk. Whether it is to be sold as Coalition Mixture or Carlton Club has
not yet been decided.

* * *

The Royal Academy have issued a notice that frames other than gilt will be
admissible this year. Many people, it is thought, who never felt attracted
by the old-fashioned gilt frames will now visit the exhibition.

* * *

An auctioneer's clerk has been summoned for throwing a bun at a railway
buffet waitress. It was a thoughtless thing to do. He might have broken it.

* * *

We have just heard of a Scottish engineer who has decided to strike out
along novel lines. Although only twenty-two years of age he has arranged to
settle down in Scotland.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Taxi-Driver_ (_who has been paid the correct fare_).
"YOU'VE FORGOTTEN SOMETHING, GOV'NOR."

_Fare._ "WHAT IS IT?"

_Taxi-Driver._ "YOUR ADDRESS. I MIGHT WANT ANOTHER MASCOT SOME DAY."]

* * * * *

From a fashion-advertisement:--

"PARIS MOVES THE WAIST-LINE."

_American Paper._

But it is believed that the young man's strong right arm will succeed in
rediscovering it.

* * * * *

"SUMMER-TIME"

(_with some moral reflections_).

To-day I left my downy lair
An hour before my wont;
But do I consequently wear
An unctuous smile? I don't.
If with the early lark's ascent
I soared from out my bed, it
Is to an Act of Parliament
That I must give the credit.

When I escape, in butter's dearth,
The fault of waxing fat,
Calmly I view my modest girth
And take no praise for that;
Not mine the glory when my soul
Abjures its ruling passion;
'Tis his, the lord of Food-control,
Who fixed my sugar-ration.

Hampered by regulations for
The chastisement of crime--
Arson and theft and marrying more
Than one wife at a time--
I like to feel some sins there be
For which the law can't hurt you,
In whose regard your heart is free
To follow vice or virtue.

Of one temptation I rejoice
Especially to think,
That leaves me loose to take my choice--
My r