Kensington.

* * *

At Question-Time in the House there was trouble over the pronunciation of
Bryngwran and Gwalchmai. One of the Welsh Members present said he could
have played them if he had had his harp with him.

* * *

Saturday afternoon funerals have been stopped at Bexhill. We are very
pleased to note this, because if there is one thing which mars the
enjoyment of the week-end it is being buried.

* * *

The Hon. JOHN COLLIER will shortly explain why he painted the famous
picture, "The Fallen Idol." If only some of our minor artists would be
equally frank.

* * *

A weekly paper is offering a prize to anybody who discovers the oldest
living fish. It is just as well that no prize is offered for the oldest
dead fish.

* * *

"Large dumps of valuable material which is slowly rotting are to be met all
along the main road in Northern France to-day," complains a morning paper.
A responsible Government official now admits that whilst motoring in that
district last week he noticed that the road was bumpy in places.

* * *

There is some talk of the Americans having a League of Notions of their
own.

* * *

M. CHARLES NORDMANN states that the world will end in ten thousand million
years. It will be interesting to see if America will refuse to take part in
this as well.

* * *

Our horticultural expert informs us that during the next two or three weeks
all wooden houses should be carefully pruned.

* * *

The rumour that Mr. MALLABY-DEELEY, M.P., will be asked to design a new
uniform for the Royal Air Force is without foundation.

* * *

It is feared that, owing to the sudden appearance of Summer weather last
week, the POET LAUREATE will once again be obliged to hold over his Spring
poem.

* * *

It seems a pity that eight of the nine bricklayers who entered for the
recent brick-laying contest should have collapsed, allowing the ninth an
easy walk-over with seven bricks to his credit.

* * *

Statistics show a remarkable increase in the Welsh birthrate as compared
with previous years. As usual, nothing is being done about it.

* * *

There are several ways, says Sir JAMES MACKENZIE, the eminent specialist,
of tracing heart weakness. One way is to charge the owner of the heart
seven-and-six for a pound of butter. If he faints he has a weak heart; if
he pays he is merely weak in the head.