se me.

5.45.--Odd--but now I find myself wondering ungratefully, whether
I mightn't have done better than PLAPPER, after all. This is human
nature, I suppose--but discreditable. I _am_ overjoyed--really. I no
longer hate people. _I_ too am an initiate! But I can pity poor devils
who are houseless, I hope.... I order sundry things: "Send them in
to PLAPPER'S." Luggage regained and sent back--to PLAPPER'S. I feel
self-respect once more.

6 P.M.--Returning to PLAPPER'S. And in this secure retreat my Nautical
drama is destined to see the light--if PLAPPER only knew! I feel an
affection already for this humble temporary home. Mrs. P. meets me at
the door. "So sorry, Sir--but _you can't have the rooms, after all_!
PLAPPER had let 'em quite unbeknown to me!"

And this is Saturday! _I am under a curse!_

* * * * *

THE BALLET.

_Lament by the Rev. S. D. Headlam._

What was it first my fancy fed,
My steps to the Alhambra led,
And finally quite turned my head?
The Ballet!

What, when I studied it apart,
Struck me with force that made me start,
As being a noble form of Art?
The Ballet!

And what, when seen night after night,
Inspired me with supreme delight,
And made me to the _Pall-Mall_ write?
The Ballet!

But what, when kindled with its fire,
I hoped my Bishop to inspire,
Alas! excited but his ire?
The Ballet!

And what, although the orthodox
Two places in an upper box
I offered him,--but gave him shocks?
The Ballet!

Ah! what, though every nerve I've strained
To see the dancers' battle gained,
Leaves me episcopally chained?
The Ballet!

* * * * *

LAST FRUITS OF THE SESSION.--Pairs.

* * * * *

[Illustration: VENICE UNPRESERVED.]

"The modern Venetian takes pleasure not only in neglecting but in
persecuting the palace and the gondola.... As to the gondola, the mass
of Venetians possess none, and rarely go in them.... They forget that
the much-desired foreigner does not come to Venice to read signboards
from a steamboat up and down the Grand Canal; and, by handing over
this magnificent waterway to a company of foreign speculators, they
have well-nigh reduced the ancient body of gondoliers to beggary. The
steamers are numerous and noisy.... If one contrasts the passengers of
these rival craft, the