my snigger which was worse than an assault.
He was a most sarcastic man, this languid ARTHUR B.,
And he aimed at being _Chef_, which JOKIM said was fiddlededee.

Now I hold it's not the duty of a culinary gent
To say his colleague is a Moke--at least to all intent;
Nor should the individual who happens to be meant
Reply by chucking crockery to any great extent.

Then Number Three Cook tried to raise an ill-done _roti_, when
He tripped o'er ARTHUR'S heels, and fell upon his abdomen;
And presently the various _plats_ were mingled on the floor;
And the subsequent proceedings let us draw a curtain o'er.

For in less time than I write it every Cooky dropped his dish,
And our _menu_ was as mucked as our worst enemy could wish;
And the way those Cookies chivied in their anger was a sin,
And the only dinner left 'em was the cheese--which _I_ took in.

And this is all I have to say concerning this sad spill;
For I live at Greenlands (Henley), and my name is Moral BILL;
And I've told in simple language all I know about the shine
That demoralised our kitchen, and upset the year's Big Dine!

* * * * *

A SWEET HOME FOR NANCY.

DEAR MR. PUNCH,--The other evening, wishing to enjoy a little music,
I went to the Lyric Theatre, and found that the opera chosen for
performance was called _Sweet Nancy_, founded upon a novel with some
similar title by Miss RHODA BROUGHTON. The prettiest tune I heard was
one that I fancy had been played before, and my belief is the stronger
as Mr. HENRY NEVILLE referred to it as "a dear old song." It had to do
with "_Darby and Joan_," and reminded me of J.L. MOLLOY'S delightful
song with that title. The rest of the music was not very striking.
Even to those who hold that the plot of an Opera is only of secondary
importance, _Sweet Nancy_ could not have appeared to be exactly
teeming with incidents. However, it was very nicely played by Miss
HUGHES, and that now mature Lancashire Lad, the aforesaid HENRY
NEVILLE. Without declaring that I should like to see it every evening
for a thousand years (which I believe is a _facon de parler_ even
in China), I certainly could sit it out again. If I wished to be a
fault-finder I should say that the piece is too long, and seems all
the longer because some of the characters are supposed to represent
schoolboys, and a girl of thirteen. The adapter is Mr. BUCHANAN--a
poet and a playwright. This gent