lanters, and under the patriarkle system uv Afrikin slavery
(wich, by the way, wuz one uv my most brilliant consepshuns), octooroons
multiplied with a rapidity pleasin to behold. But now, alas! the
octooroon bizness is done, and my best holt is gone. I hev some little
hope, however. The Dimocrisy are displayin a vigger I didn't think they
possest. Ef they kin only git strength enuff to elect the next President
and re-establish slavery! The thought fills me with unutterable joy. The
redoosin of the nigger to bondage agin wood give me a clean title to
evry last one who helped to do it, and in gittin em back into their
normal condishun (by the way, that's another phrase uv mine), ther'd be
enuff slaughterin and murders to satisfy several sich Satans ez I am.
I'd help em ef I knowd how, but I can't improve on either their speekers
or writers, and ez long ez men will do my work gratis, I don't see the
yoose uv interferin."

At this pint a couple uv small imps undertook to push me into the
stream, and in the struggle, I awoke. My dreem wuz o'er, but the
impreshun remained. "Kin it be," mused I, pensively, "that we are doin
the devil's work, and are we to be finally rewarded in the manner I saw
in my vision? Ef so, hedn't I better quit and repent?"

But I thought agin, that however it mite be for younger men, it wood be
uv no yoose for me. I hed voted the strait ticket for thirty years, and
the ten or twelve years I hed to live wuz too short a time in which to
repent successfully uv sich iniquity. So I sank into sleep agin, this
time dreemin that I had turned Fenian--hed elected myself Hed Center for
the Stait uv Kentucky, and wuz just investin $75,000 in a magnificent
plantashun.

PETROLEUM V. NASBY,
Lait Paster uv the Church uv the Noo Dispensashun.

X.

SONNIT

Onto a Soldier, wich wuz wunst a Dimekrat, but is now a howlin
Ablishnist, wich I saw a limpin about on one Leg, hevin left the other
at Anteetam.

Bloo-koted monster! thou wentest forth
Armed with thy rifle and sharp-pinted bayonet,
Whose peeked eend with Southern blood is wet:
I hate thee, tool and minyun uv the North!
Thou wast a Dimekrat: them kote and pants,
The wavin flag, the gun with peeked eend,
Turned yoo into a Abolishn feend,
Who sucked the blood uv Dimekratic saints.
Monster unnachral! by niggerism hatched,
Thousands and more uv Dimokrats yoo've slai