at Demokrat in your township who takes a paper reseeve it
contaminated by the touch uv a Ablishin radical."

[Illustration: NASBY'S DREAM OF THE PHILADELPHIA CONVENTION.]

At this critical pint I awoke. Wood that that dream wuz a reality! Will
I only git that postoffis in a dream.

PETROLEUM V. NASBY,
Lait Paster uv the Church uv the Noo Dispensashun.

XXVIII.

The Reward of Virtue.--After Months of waiting, the Virtuous Patriot
secures his Loaf.--The Jollification.

CONFEDRIT x ROADS
(wich is in the Stait uv Kentucky),
August 12, 1866.

At last I hev it! Finally it come! After five weary trips to Washington,
after much weary waitin and much travail, I hev got it. I am now Post
Master at Confedrit x Roads, and am dooly installed in my new position.
Ef I ever hed any doubts ez to A. Johnson bein a better man than Paul
the Apossle, a look at my commission removes it. If I ketch myself a
feelin that he deserted us onnecessarily five years ago, another look,
and my resentment softens into pity. Ef I doubt his Democrisy, I look at
that blessed commission, and am reassured, for a President who cood turn
out a wounded Federal soldier, and apoint sich a man ez ME, must be
above suspicion.

I felt it wuz coming two weeks ago. I received a cirkler from Randall,
now my sooperior in offis, propoundin these questions:--

1. Do yoo hev the most implicit faith in Androo Johnson, in all
that he hez done, all that he is doin, and all he may hereafter
do?

2. Do you bleeve that the Philadelphia Convenshun will be a
convocashen uv saints, all actuated by pure motives, and devoted
to the salvation uv our wunst happy, but now distractid country?

3. Do yoo bleeve that, next to A. Johnson, Seward, Doolittle,
Cowan, and Randall are the four greatest, and purest, and
bestest, and self-sacrificinest, and honestest, and righteousist
men that this country hez ever prodoost?

4. Doo yoo bleeve that there is a partikelerly hot place
reserved in the next world for Trumbull, a hotter for Wade, and
the hottest for Sumner and Thad Stevens?

5. Do yoo approve uv the canin uv Grinnell by Rosso?

6. Do yoo consider the keepin out uv Congris eleven sovrin
states a unconstooshnel and u