or I own [the truth], that I am
easy to be seduced by my appetite; I snuff up my nose at a savory smell:
I am weak, lazy; and, if you have a mind to add any thing else, I am a
sot. But seeing you are as I am, and perhaps something worse, why do you
willfully call me to an account as if you were the better man; and, with
specious phrases, disguise your own vice? What, if you are found out to
be a greater fool than me, who was purchased for five hundred drachmas?
Forbear to terrify me with your looks; restrain your hand and your
anger, while I relate to you what Crispinus' porter taught me.

"Another man's wife captivates you; a harlot, Davus: which of us sins
more deservingly of the cross? When keen nature inflames me, any common
wench that picks me up, dismisses me neither dishonored, nor caring
whether a richer or a handsomer man enjoys her next. You, when you have
cast off your ensigns of dignity, your equestrian ring and your Roman
habit, turn out from a magistrate a wretched Dama, hiding with a cape
your perfumed head: are you not really what you personate? You are
introduced, apprehensive [of consequences]; and, as you are altercating
With your passions, your bones shake with fear. What is the difference
whether you go condemned [like a gladiator], to be galled with scourges,
or slain with the sword; or be closed up in a filthy chest, where [the
maid], concious of her mistress' crime, has stowed you? Has not the
husband of the offending dame a just power over both; against the
seducer even a juster? But she neither changes her dress, nor place, nor
sins to that excess [which you do]; since the woman is in dread of you,
nor gives any credit to you, though you profess to love her. You must go
under the yoke knowingly, and put all your fortune, your life, and
reputation, together with your limbs, into the power of an enraged
husband. Have you escaped? I suppose, then, you will be afraid [for the
future]; and, being warned, will be cautious. No, you will seek occasion
when you may be again in terror, and again may be likely to perish. O so
often a slave! What beast, when it has once escaped by breaking its
toils, absurdly trusts itself to them again? You say, "I am no
adulterer." Nor, by Hercules, am I a thief, when I wisely pass by the
silver vases. Take away the danger, and vagrant nature will spring
forth, when restraints are removed. Are you my superior, subjected as
you are, to the dominion of so many things and pe