to be some time before he gets back if any such a
deadlock like that happened, Abe," Morris said, "because I see where it
says in the papers that Mr. Wilson won't come back until he has signed
the treaties of peace with Germany and Austria, and France and England
won't agree to finish up the treaties for Mr. Wilson's signature until
they know that the United States Senate will ratify them and the United
States Senate won't ratify them until they are finished up and submitted
to them signed by Mr. Wilson, and then I didn't read no more about it,
Abe, because I begun to get dizzy."

"I very often get that way myself nowadays when I am reading in the
newspapers, Mawruss," Abe said, "in particular when they print them full
texts, like the full text of the League of Nations Covenant or the full
text of the President's message. Former times when the papers had in
'em straight murders and bank robberies from the inside or out, Mawruss,
and you sat opposite somebody in the Subway who had to move his lips
while he was reading, you took it for granted that he was an ignoramus
which had to hear them simple words pronounced, even if it was by his
own lips, before he could understand them, Mawruss, but you take this
here letter of the 20th inst., Mawruss, and when you read where
President Wilson says with reference to telephone and telegraph rates,
Mawruss, 'there are many confusions and inconsistencies of rates. The
scientific means by which communication by such instrumentalities could
missing be rendered more thorough and satisfactory has not been made
full use of,' understand me, you could move your lips, your scalp,
Heaven and Earth, Mawruss, and still you couldn't tell what Mr. Wilson
was driving into."

"Well, I glanced over that Message myself, Abe," Morris said, "and the
capital I's was sticking up all through it like toothpicks on the
cashier's desk of an armchair lunch-room, Abe. In just a few lines, Abe,
Mr. Wilson says, 'I hesitate, I feel, I am conscious, I trust, I may, I
shall, I dare say, I hope and I shall,' and when he started to say
something about Woman Suffrage, he undoubtedly begun with 'May I not,'
but evidently when he showed the first draft to Colonel House or
somebody, they said, 'Why do you always say, _May I not_'? and after
discussing such substitutes as '_Doch allow me_,' 'If you 'ain't got no
objections,' and 'You would excuse me if I would take the liberty,' Abe,
they decided to use, 'Will you not p