ey ain't idealists, Mawruss."

"Just the same, Abe, a man should ought to know what he don't know and
side-step it," Morris said.

"But the way it is in this country, Mawruss, a multimillionaire can't
side-step it. The newspapers won't let him, because if he gets a
reputation for having made fifty million dollars in the safety-pin
business, we would say, for example, and news gets so scarce in the
newspapers that somebody starts a discussion about which is the biggest
musician, Kreisler _oder_ Zimbalist, y'understand, right away the editor
sends out reporters to interview the most prominent men in the country
as to what their opinion is in the matter, and naturally one of the
first men such a reporter would call on is Harris J. Rosenbaum, the
Safety-pin King. Now, what is Rosenbaum going to do under the
circumstances? Is he going to admit to the reporter that up to date he
has been so busy in his safety-pin plant that he 'ain't had time to
post himself as to whether Kreisler and Zimbalist is performers on the
trombone _oder_ the mouth-organ? _Oser!_ He finds out from the reporter
that these two fellers has got a piece-work wage-scale for playing on
the fiddle of five dollars a note, net cash, and he says that both of
them is wonderful fiddlers, y'understand, but that to his mind Kreisler
plays with more of the artistic temperature than Zimbalist, or if he
doesn't actually say so, y'understand, the reporter goes back to his
newspaper and _says_ he said so, and the consequence is that when in
next Sunday's paper Rosenbaum reads,

KREISLER GREATER ARTIST
SAYS SAFETY-PIN KING,

he not only begins to believe that he did say it, but also that it's
funny how a man can go on for years being an expert on fiddle-playing
and only find it out by accident, as it were."

"And I suppose that a few months later, on the strength of what he
_don't_ know about fiddle-playing, Abe," Morris remarked, "Harris J.
Rosenbaum, the Safety-pin King, is running for United States Senator and
comes pretty near getting elected, too."

"There don't seem to be no reason why he wouldn't be," Abe declared,
"because just so long as United States Senators is selected by election
and not by a competitive examination, Mawruss, there will always be a
certain percentage of Harris J. Rosenbaums in the United States Senate,
which you can't keep millionaires out of public office, if they want to
fool away their time in such things, and after all, Mawrus