rnment, Abe?" Morris Perlmutter asked.

"Germany and Hungary do," Abe replied, "which up to the time this here
General Blanquet lands the other day in Mexico, people was beginning to
say that why couldn't Germany have one last revolution and stick to it
and look at Mexico the way she settled down, not having had a single
revolution to speak of since January fifteenth, nineteen-nineteen."

"Well, I think the reason why the Mexicans 'ain't had a revolution in so
long isn't because they didn't want to, Abe," Morris said, "but because
it has taken them all that time to learn the technical terms. You see, a
really and truly up-to-date revolution couldn't be run off nowadays,
Abe, unless it is one of them Bolshevik Type revolutions, and in order
to get the right kind of newspaper publicity for it the management has
got to know enough Russian not to say _soviet_ when they mean _mir_.
Also I bet yer when it comes to a zemstvo, the Mexicans don't know even
now whether you dance it to a guitar and cascanet accompaniment or eat
it with garlic and chili sauce."

"A feller could make quite some money nowadays from teaching Russian by
mail to revolutionary socialists," Abe commented.

"That ain't necessary in this country, Abe," Morris said, "because the
Bolshevik government in Russia has sent over here a feller by the name
of Martens to give a course in Bolshevism to American working-men."

"And did our government let him land?" Abe asked.

"Seemingly they did," Morris replied, "which is pretty liberal of our
government when you consider that right now we got American soldiers in
Russia which is fighting Bolshevism."

"It's even more than liberal, it's crazy," Abe said, "because while I
believe in free speech, y'understand, Bolshevik speeches ain't free by a
whole lot. Over in Hungary they became payable in thirty, sixty, and
ninety days and the only people which ain't ruined by them is the makers
and indorsers."

"You are right about the makers, Abe," Morris commented. "For the most
part they are a bunch of no-account foreigners which all they risk by
making such speeches is hoarseness, y'understand, but some of the
indorsers of such speeches comes from the best American families, and if
the time ever comes when there _should_ be a little temporary Bolshevik
trouble by foreigners in this country who have been encouraged by the
liberal attitude of the government to think that the worst which could
happen to them would be ten