h as I admire you, Doctor, I
think your office hours are a nuisance to the rest of us. I had to elbow
my way out of the house this morning between a double line of sufferers
from mumps and influenza, and other pleasingly afflicted patients of
yours, and I didn't like it very much."

"I don't believe they liked it much either," returned the Doctor. "One
man with a sprained ankle told me about you. You shoved him in passing."

"Well, you can apologize to him in my behalf," returned the Idiot; "but
you might add that he must expect very much the same treatment whenever
he and a boy with mumps stand between me and the door. Sprained ankles
aren't contagious, and I preferred shoving him to the other alternative."

The Doctor was silent, and the Idiot rose to go. "Where will the house be
this evening about six-thirty, Mrs. Pedagog?" he asked, as he pushed his
chair back from the table.

"Where? Why, here, of course," returned the landlady.

"Why, yes--of course," observed the Idiot, with an impatient gesture.
"How foolish of me! I've really been so wrapped up in my canal-boat ideal
that I came to believe that it might possibly be real and not a dream,
after all. I almost believed that perhaps I should find that the house
had been towed somewhere up into Westchester County on my return, so that
we might all escape the city's tax on personal property, which I am told
is unusually high this year."

With which sally the Idiot kissed his hand to Mr. Pedagog and retired
from the scene.

II

"Let's write a book," suggested the Idiot, as he took his place at the
board and unfolded his napkin.

"What about?" asked the Doctor, with a smile at the idea of the Idiot's
thinking of embarking on literary pursuits.

"About four hundred pages long," said the Idiot. "I feel inspired."

"You are inspired," said the School-Master. "In your way you are a
genius. I really never heard of such a variegated Idiot as you are in all
my experience, and that means a great deal, I can tell you, for in the
course of my career as an instructor of youth I have encountered many
idiots."

"Were they idiots before or after having drank at the fount of your
learning?" asked the Idiot, placidly.

Mr. Pedagog glared, and the Idiot was apparently satisfied. To make Mr.
Pedagog glare appeared to be one of the chiefest of his ambitions.

"You will kindly remember, Mr. Idiot," said Mrs. Pedagog at this point,
"that Mr. Pedagog is my husband, a