ued the
matter before, whilst he thought it a Persian custom, but since it was
discovered to be the Greek fashion too, it wanted (he thought) some
reason to excuse or defend its seeming absurdity. For our reason ( much
moisture, is hard to be moved, and unable to perform its operations. And
all sorts of troubles and discontents, like insects to the sun, creeping
forth, and being agitated by a glass of wine, make the mind irresolute
and inconstant. Therefore as a bed is more convenient for a man whilst
making merry than a chair, because it contains the whole body and keeps
it from all disturbing motion, so it is best to have the soul perfectly
at quiet; or, if that cannot be, we must give it, as to children that
will be doing, not a sword or spear, but a rattle or a ball,--in this
following the example of the god himself, who puts into the hands of
those that are making merry a ferula, the lightest and softest of all
weapons, that, when they are most apt to strike, they may hurt least.
Over a glass of wine men should make only ridiculous slips, and not
such as may prove tragical, lamentable, or of any considerable concern.
Besides, in serious debates, it is chiefly to be considered, that
persons of mean understanding and unacquainted with business should
be guided by the wise and experienced; but wine destroys this order.
Insomuch that Plato says, wine is called [Greek omitted] because it
makes those that drink it [Greek omitted] think that they have wit; for
none over a glass of wine thinks himself so noble, beauteous, or rich
(though he fancies himself all these), as wise; and therefore wine is
babbling, full of talk, and of a dictating humor; so that we are rather
for being heard than hearing, for leading than being led. But a thousand
such objections may be raised, for they are very obvious. But let us
hear which of the company, either old or young, can allege anything for
the contrary opinion.

Then said my brother cunningly: And do you imagine that any, upon a
sudden, can produce any probable reasons? And Nicostratus replying, Yes,
no doubt, there being so many learned men and good drinkers in company;
he with a smile continued: Do you think, sir, you are fit to treat of
these matters, when wine hath disabled you to discourse of politics and
state affairs? Or is not this all the same as to think that a man in
his liquor doth not see very well nor understand those that talk and
discourse with him, yet hears the musi