humour.

* * * * *

GIANTS REFRESHED.

[Illustration: Our Leaders. "ENOUGH OF DEEDS! LET'S GET TO WORDS!"]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Son (lately returned from big game shooting in Africa)._
"There I stood, the ferocious beast facing me, not a yard away--a
situation needing such calmness and courage as in this quiet little
suburb, my dear mother, you would never be called upon to display."

_Parlourmaid._ "If you please, 'M, there's another bison in the kitchen.
What would you wish done with it?"

_Mother (accustomed to Cockney accent)._ "Put it in Mr. Jack's room,
Beatrice, and take away the one that's chipped."]

* * * * *

TO BE OVERHEARD DAILY.

Scene--_A Restaurant._

_First Luncher._ Waiter, bring me the bill, please.

_Waiter._ Yes, Sir.

_Second Luncher._ No, I say, old man, this is mine. Waiter, bring the
bill to me.

_W._ Yes, Sir.

_F. L._ No, waiter, it's mine.

_S. L._ My dear old chap----

_F. L._ Yes, it's mine. Get it, waiter.

_W._ Yes, Sir.

_S. L._ But I asked you.

_F. L._ No, I asked you.

_S. L._ Yes, but I asked you first.

_F. L._ That doesn't matter.

_S. L._ Of course it does. And I've been doing all the ordering too.

_F. L._ That's all right. I'm glad you have. You do it very well.

_S. L._ Well, I want to pay.

_F. L._ Oh, no, my dear fellow. It's my lunch. I've been feeling like
the host all the time.

_S. L._ So have I. I haven't felt like a guest at all. It's my bill.

_F. L._ I couldn't hear of it. You came here to lunch with me.

_S. L._ Upon my soul, I thought you were lunching with me. I asked you,
you know.

_F. L._ You can't deny I asked you; I said, "We'll lunch together next
Thursday," didn't I?

_S. L._ That's all right, but I swear I asked you first. It was because
I had asked you that you said what you said.

_F. L._ Well, I look on it as my lunch, anyway.

_S. L._ Then why did you let me order the things and send back that
wine?

_F. L._ That's all right, old man. You've been lunching with me to-day.
Next time I'll lunch with you.

_S. L._ I'm not satisfied with it. I consider this my lunch.

_F. L._ No, no. It's mine. Here's the waiter.

_S. L._ Waiter, let me have that.

_F. L._ No, waiter, give it to me.

_S. L. (snatching the bill, glancing at it, and hastily slamming down a
sovereign)._ That's all right, waiter. Keep the chang