Grushnitski is to blame for that."
"Oh, no!"
And her face became so pensive, so sad, that I promised myself that I
would not fail to kiss her hand that evening.
The guests began to disperse. As I was handing Princess Mary into her
carriage, I rapidly pressed her little hand to my lips. The night was
dark and nobody could see.
I returned to the saloon very well satisfied with myself.
The young men, Grushnitski amongst them, were having supper at the
large table. As I came in, they all fell silent: evidently they had been
talking about me. Since the last ball many of them have been sulky with
me, especially the captain of dragoons; and now, it seems, a hostile
gang is actually being formed against me, under the command of
Grushnitski. He wears such a proud and courageous air...
I am very glad; I love enemies, though not in the Christian sense. They
amuse me, stir my blood. To be always on one's guard, to catch every
glance, the meaning of every word, to guess intentions, to crush
conspiracies, to pretend to be deceived and suddenly with one blow
to overthrow the whole immense and laboriously constructed edifice of
cunning and design--that is what I call life.
During supper Grushnitski kept whispering and exchanging winks with the
captain of dragoons.
CHAPTER XI. 14th June.
VERA and her husband left this morning for Kislovodsk. I met their
carriage as I was walking to Princess Ligovski's. Vera nodded to me:
reproach was in her glance.
Who is to blame, then? Why will she not give me an opportunity of
seeing her alone? Love is like fire--if not fed it dies out. Perchance,
jealousy will accomplish what my entreaties have failed to do.
I stayed a whole hour at Princess Ligovski's. Mary has not been out, she
is ill. In the evening she was not on the boulevard. The newly formed
gang, armed with lorgnettes, has in very fact assumed a menacing aspect.
I am glad that Princess Mary is ill; they might be guilty of some
impertinence towards her. Grushnitski goes about with dishevelled locks,
and wears an appearance of despair: he is evidently afflicted, as a
matter of fact; his vanity especially has been injured. But, you see,
there are some people in whom even despair is diverting!...
On my way home I noticed that something was lacking. I have not seen
her! She is ill! Surely I have not fallen in love with her in real
earnest?... What nonsense!
CHAPTER XII. 15th June.
AT eleven o'clock in t
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