derate terms.

_Magic Mirrors, Divining Rods, &c., Loaned or Sold,
Soirees commence at 8._

AMERICAN DRINKS.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Gentleman in Cart._ "I SAY, GUV'NOR, BRING US OUT A
SPOONFUL O' GIN FOR THE OLD LADY, WILL YER?--AND I'LL TAKE A PINT O'
MILD ALE--AND LOOK HERE. I DON'T WANT IT THICK--FOR I _AIN'T HUNGRY!_"]

* * * * *

OUR RUPTURE WITH RUSSIA.

We cannot help regretting that anything should be done by our military
authorities to irritate the sore place which has been established in our
relations with Russia. We, therefore, read with a degree of pain--which
made us almost cry out, for we were really much hurt--that a letter
dated June 27th, 1853, has gone out from the Horse Guards, prohibiting
all general and staff officers from wearing Russia ducks by way of
trousers. Whether this is meant as an insult to Russia we are unable to
state; but we fear that Russia in the present sensitive state of affairs
will regard this declaration of war against Russia ducks as an
indication of a desire to provoke hostilities.

* * * * *

DIPLOMATIC PASTRY.--There is every probability that the dish heretofore
known as NESSELRODE Pudding will, in future, be denominated Humble Pie.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE CAMP

_Captain Holster._ "HERE! HI! SOME ONE!--STOP MY _BED ROOM!_--HI!"]

* * * * *

A SEAMSTRESS THAT WON'T STARVE.

The _Glasgow Chronicle_ describes a sewing machine, which has been
introduced by a MR. DARLING. This DARLING will be considered a duck by
some of our fashionable milliners; and his Jenny will be just the
seamstress for their money, as she will ask no wages, want no food but a
little oil, and be able to do without any rest whatever. Our own shirts,
also, will be more comfortable to wear when we shall be enabled to think
to ourselves that their manufacture has been ground out of wheels and
cogs at small cost, and not out of human nerves and muscles for
miserable pay.

* * * * *

DRINKING HEALTH.

MR. HARKER will perhaps have the goodness to propose at the next great
Civic banquet this toast:--"Extramural Interment: or the Incorporation
of London with Gravesend."

[Illustration: A GENTLE REPROOF.

_Grenadier._ "I SAY BILL, I WONDER WHAT THEM LADIES WOULD SAY, IF WE WAS
TO GO LOOKING INTO _