ered how Jennie
and Sadie and Clara and Nellie, whose names I heard openly mentioned,
would have felt to have heard themselves described as "a nice, soft
little thing to hug," or "she knows how to kiss."

Do you imagine these young men would have thus spoken had they truly
respected the girls? They might say "They are nice girls," but would
they say, in their deeper consciousness, "They are true,
self-respecting, womanly girls, and I honor them?"

"But what is a girl to do?" asks one. "If she is prudish she won't get
any attention. She has to allow a certain innocent freedom, or young
men won't go with her."

Do you really believe that, dear girl? Let me tell you what young men
have said to me. Said one, "O, we have to be familiar with the girls.
They all expect it, and would be offended if we were just friendly and
manifested no familiarities." Do you suppose girls ever thought of the
possibility of the young men saying that? When they are pleading for
permission to be familiar they do sometimes say, "Why, all the girls
allow it," but they also add, "so there can be no harm;" while among
themselves they are laughing at the credulity of the girls, or
accusing them of making it necessary for the young men to take
"innocent" liberties in order to have the good will of the girls.

A young man may assure you most emphatically that he respects you none
the less, although you allow him to hold your hand or kiss you at
parting, but he knows it is not true, and he will admit it to others
rather than to the girl herself. Truthful young men say, "Of course,
we have the most respect for the girls who keep us at a distance."
"But they won't pay us attention," say the girls. "Is that so?" I
asked of a young man. "Are you more earnest in pursuit of the girl who
courts approaches, or the girl who holds you at bay?" "Why!" responded
he, with emphasis, "the girls ought to know that a boy wants most that
which is hardest to get; but we are actually obliged to treat the
girls with familiarity or they won't go with us." And this young man
seemed really surprised when I assured him that girls supposed they
were obliged to accept caresses in order to have the attention of
young men. Then this same young man spoke of something that I know to
be too often true. He said, "It is strange, if the girls don't want
these things, that they act as they do, for they actually invite
familiarity. In fact, many times I would have been glad to be
resp