she
misses your presence, she already begins to feel the loneliness of the
inevitable separation. If you are thoughtful you will see to it that
the separation does not begin sooner than is necessary. Then, too,
your parents need to get acquainted with this new member whom you are
to introduce into the family, and he needs to know them. He will think
none the less of you if he sees that you do not allow him to
monopolize you entirely, that you recognize your obligations to the
family and that you expect him to recognize them also, and, in
addition, his obligations to show them due courtesy and attention. He
is not to absorb you entirely, to take you out of the home circle, but
he is to come in and be a part of it, even as you are to become one in
the home of which he is a member. You need to remember that he is son
and brother to women who loved him long before you knew him, and that
he still owes them attention and thoughtful, affectionate courtesy.

Never allow yourself to feel jealous of his mother or sisters. The
fact that he is a loving, thoughtful son and brother is in a measure a
guarantee that he will be a loving, thoughtful husband.

Let me add to this advice a word more. Do not allow yourself to feel
jealous of him in any way. Jealousy is the quintessence of
selfishness, and no other passion is so destructive of happiness, so
full of the contagion of evil. If your lover is not to be trusted, you
would be wise to end the engagement at once. If he is to be trusted,
that trust should be absolute. I said you should not allow him to
monopolize you, neither should you attempt to monopolize him. There
are other people in the world besides yourself, and other occupations
than the business of waiting on you. If you make him feel that he dare
not speak to anyone but you, that he dare not think of anything but
you, he will begin to chafe under the restraint and feel a desire to
break the bonds that are becoming fetters. If he were not your
acknowledged lover, if you were anxious to win his love, but were a
little uncertain as to your power to do so, you would not meet him
with tears and upbraidings because he had for one moment seemed to
forget you, but you would at once use every possible effort to make
yourself more attractive in his eyes than any other person could
possibly be. You will be wise to use those same tactics now, even
though his allegiance is pledged to you. Be so charming that no one
else can be conside