cquaintance is sometimes perplexing. But the young man, having
had the good taste to purchase a copy of PERFECT BEHAVIOR, is having no
difficulty. He has fastened a rope across the sidewalk in front of the
lady's house and, with the aid of a match and some kerosene, has set
fire to the house. Driven by the heat, the young lady will eventually
emerge and in her haste will fall over the rope. To a gentleman of
gallantry and ingenuity the rest should be comparatively simple.}

{illustration caption = A knowledge of the language of flowers is
essential to a successful courtship and may avoid much unnecessary pain.
With the best intentions in the world the young man is about to present
the young lady with a flower of whose meaning he is in total ignorance.
The young lady, being a faithful student of PERFECT BEHAVIOR, knows its
exact meaning and it will be perfectly correct for her to turn and,
with a frigid bow, break the pot over the young man's head. Alas, how
differently this romance might have ended if the so-called "friends" of
the young man had tactfully but firmly pointed out to him the value of a
book on etiquette such as PERFECT BEHAVIOR.}

LETTERS TO NEWSPAPERS, MAGAZINES, ETC.

Another type of public correspondence is the letter which is intended
for publication in some periodical. This is usually written by elderly
gentlemen with whiskers and should be cast in the following form:

A Correct Letter from an Elderly Gentleman to the Editor of a Newspaper
or Magazine

To the Editor:
SIR:

On February next, Deo volente, I shall have been a constant
reader of your worthy publication for forty-one years. I feel,
sir, that that record gives me the right ipso facto to offer my
humble criticism of a statement made in your November number by
that worthy critic of the drama, Mr. Heywood Broun. Humanum est
errare, and I am sure that Mr. Broun (with whom I have
unfortunately not the honour of an acquaintance) will forgive me
for calling his attention to what is indeed a serious, and I
might say, unbelievable, misstatement. In my younger days, now
long past, it was not considered infra dig for a critic to reply
to such letters as this, and I hope that Mr. Broun will deem this
epistle worthy of consideration, and recognize the justice of my
complaint.

I remember well a controversy that raged between critic and
public for many weeks in the days when Joe Jefferson was playing
Ri