ntinople there are signs that it is being realised that
the Germans are driving the Turkish Army to Suez-side.

* * *

When the Germans and the Russians both claim to have won the same
battle, what can one do? asks a correspondent. We can only suggest that
the matter should be referred to the Hague Tribunal.

* * *

An item of war news which the President of the Society for the Promotion
of Propriety thinks the Censor might very well have censored:--"To the
south of Lask the Russian troops took Shertzoff."

* * *

"The Grenadier Guard, 6 ft. 7 in. high, whom the Prince of Wales noticed
in hospital, is not the tallest man in the British Army, that
distinction being claimed for Corporal Frank Millin, 2nd Coldstream
Guards, who is 6 ft. 8-1/2 in." This, again, is the sort of paragraph
which might have been censored with advantage, for we are quite sure
that, if the PRINCE OF WALES'S giant sees it, it will cause a relapse.

* * *

For the first time for many years there were no charges of murder at the
December Sessions at the Old Bailey. It looks as if yet another of our
industries has been filched by the Germans.

* * *

The SECRETARY OF THE ADMIRALTY announces that candidates for
assistant-clerkships, Royal Navy, who have completed a period of not
less than three months' actual military service with His Majesty's
Forces since mobilisation, will be granted fifty marks in the
examination. It seems a most unpatriotic proceeding to pay them in
German money.

* * *

_The Nursing Times_ must really be more careful or we shall have the
German newspapers drawing attention to atrocities by the French. In its
issue of the 5th inst. our contemporary says:--"The 'Train unit' whose
names we gave some weeks ago have waited all this time for their call
for duty.... And now the French authorities have cut the train--and the
staff--in two!"

* * *

Reply to those who think it absurd to take precautions against
invasion:--It's the Hun-expected that always happens.

* * *

A great fall of cliff occurred last week between Beachy Head and
Seaford, and the Germans are pointing out that the break-up of England
has now begun in earnest.

* * * * *

Illustration: "I'M AFRAID IT'LL HAVE TO GO TO THE SAME PLACE AS MY
GERMAN PIPE WENT--THE DUSTBIN. IT SUITED ME, TOO."

* * * * *

Mr. Wells on Men's Wear.