enny years!

ROBERT.

* * * * *

CARON AND CHARON.

(_AFTER DIPPING INTO MAJOR LE CARON'S "RECOLLECTIONS."_)

MAJOR LE CARON! Major! True, a greater
Or more accomplished spy who ever knew?
And so original! In fact, the _pater_
Of all deception yields the palm to You!
Courageous, honest, crafty, how you met
Wile with wile wilier! And then, forsooth,
You so transformed yourself to suit each set,
That it is praise to say, "you lied like truth!"
And in an honest cause! Renown'd Ulysses,
That craftiest hero yields to you in guile.
You touch the gold! You're not the man who misses
A chance! You caught the wariest with your smile!
"CARON!" The "h" is dropped, or we could fix
(And so we can if Greek the name we make)
You as the ancient Ferryman of Styx,
Punting the Ghosts across the Stygian lake.
The simile is nearly perfect, note,
For you, with your Conspirators afloat,
Were, as you've shown us, all in the same boat.

* * * * *

AT IT AGAIN!

The following correspondence and extracts have been sent to _Mr.
Punch_ for publication:--

I.--_Koniglich-Kaiserlicher Ober-Hof-Rath Doctor Hermann Dummwitz von
Hammelfleisch to The Emperor-King William the Second._

MOST GRACIOUS IMPERIAL MAJESTY,

I have the honour to announce to your Majesty, that my spouse, the
beautiful and accomplished clergyman-daughter, ANNA ANSELMA, whom,
by your Majesty's ever-to-be-with-gratitude-remembered permission, I
last year to the altar led, is now of good hope, and will shortly, if
all should go well, add one to your Majesty's loyal and submissive
subjects. I make this announcement in accordance with your Majesty's
Hochzeit's Decree, Section 6.

And I remain, &c. &c. &c., DUMMWITZ VON HAMMELFLEISCH.

II.--_William the Second to K.K.O.H.R.D.H.D. von Hammelfleisch._

HERR DOCTOR,

I have received your letter. In accordance with Section 7 of my
Hochzeit's Decree, I graciously give permission for the birth of the
child referred to in your communication. I beg, at the same time, to
point out that, by my Supplementary Decree (Proportions of Sexes),
issued last week, it is necessary that the child should be a boy.
Communicate this at once to the Frau K.E. Ober-Hof-Rathin Doctorin
A.A. VON HAMMELFLEISCH.

(Signed) WILLIAM I. ET R.

III.--_K.K.O.H.R.D. von Hammelfleisch to the Emperor-King, William the
Second._

MOS