use the moment you discovered that she had a thought or a sentiment
that was not subordinated to your will.
You have let her go, believing that she had been playing a pretty part
behind your back, and that I was her confidante, and perhaps also the
instigator of her wicked deeds.
Lillie has taken refuge with her children's old nurse.
How significant! Lillie, who has as many friends as either of us, knows
by a subtle instinct that none of them would befriend her in her
misfortune.
If you, Professor, were a large-hearted man, what would you do? You
would explain to the chief doctor at the infirmary Lillie's great wish
to remain near Schlegel until the end comes.
Weigh what I am saying well. Lillie is, and will always remain the same.
She loves you, and such a line of conduct on your part would fill her
with grateful joy. What does it matter if during the few days or weeks
that she is with this poor condemned man, who can neither recognize her,
nor speak, nor make the least movement, you have to put up with some
inconvenience?
If Lillie had your consent to be near Schlegel, she would certainly not
refuse to return to her wifely duties as soon as he was dead. It is
possible that at first she might not be able to hide her grief from you;
then it would be your task to help her win back her peace of mind.
I know something of Schlegel; during the last few years I have seen a
good deal of him. Without being a remarkable personality, there was
something about him that attracted women. They attributed to him all the
qualities which belonged to the heroes of their dreams. Do you
understand me? I can believe that a woman who admired strength and
manliness might see in Schlegel a type of firm, inflexible manhood;
while a woman attracted by tenderness might equally think him capable of
the most yielding gentleness. The secret probably lay in the fact that
this man, who knew so many women, possessed the rare faculty of taking
each one according to her temperament.
Schlegel was a living man; but had he been a portrait, or character in
a novel, Lillie would have fallen in love with him just the same,
because her love was purely of the imagination.
You must do what you please. But one thing I want you to understand: if
you are not going to act in the matter, I shall do so. I willingly
confess that I am a selfish woman; but I am very fond of Lillie, and if
you abandon her in this cruel and clumsy way, I shall have her to
|