tion happens to be a seaman, he will be
included on A.F.Z.8 in the figures appearing in the square of
intersection between the horizontal column opposite Industrial
Group 2 and the vertical column for Dispersal Area Ib."

Yet there are people who still complain of a want of simplicity in the
demobilisation regulations.

* * * * *

STAGES.

1914.

Mr. Smith (of Smith, Smith and Smith, Solicitors) sat in his office
awaiting his confidential clerk. There was a rattle as of castanets
outside the door. It was produced by the teeth of the confidential
clerk, Mr. Adolphus Brown.

Mr. Smith was a martinet ...

1915.

Second-Lieutenant A. Brown was drilling his platoon. There was a
rattle as of castanets. It was produced by the teeth of the platoon.

Adolphus was a martinet ...

1916.

The raiding, party hurled itself into the trench, headed by an
officer of ferocious mien. There was a rattle as of castanets. It was
produced by the teeth of the 180th Regiment of Landsturmers, awaiting
destruction.

Adolphus fell upon them ...

1917.

Captain A. Brown, M.C., on leave, sat by his fireside. There was a
rattle as of castanets. It was produced by the teeth of Adolphus,
Junior.

Daddy had changed ...

1918.

Major A. Brown, D.S.O., M.C. (on permanent Home Service) was awaiting
the next case. There was a rattle as of castanets. It was produced
by the teeth of No. 45012 Private Smith (of Smith, Smith and Smith,
Solicitors), called up in his group and late for parade.

Adolphus was famous for severity ...

1919.

Mr. (late Major) Adolphus Brown stood outside the door of Mr. (late
No. 45012) Smith (of Smith, Smith and Smith, Solicitors). There was a
rattle as of castanets ...

On which side of the door?

Both.

* * * * *

"Mr. Ian Macpherson, the new Chief Secretary for Ireland, posed
specially yesterday for the _Sunday Pictorial_. He has a difficult
task to face."--_Sunday Pictorial_.

Let us hope they will keep the portrait from him as long a possible.

* * * * *

"Three new telephone lines have been laid between London
and Paris, and it is now possible to pick up a telephone in
Downing Street and speak directly to Mr. Lloyd George at any
time."--_Daily Chronicle_.

Immediately on the appearance of the above a long queue formed in
Downing Street. Further telephone