ht way--and then
I rinse the soap off again. I learnt that trick from watching our
washer-woman--she had such lovely hands."

"Why do you never use powder now, Estelle?" asked Rosalie. "Before the
War one could never come near you without leaving footprints."

"My reasons were partly patriotic, conserving the food supply, you
know, and partly owing to the mulatto-like tint the war-flour gave me.
One doesn't want to go about looking half-baked, does one?"

"No," we murmured, making a pretty concerted number of it.

"But wrinkles, darling Estelle," I pleaded--"do tell us what you do
for your wrinkles."

"Wrinkles," murmured Estelle, with a pretty puckering of her brow--"I
haven't any left; I've given them all to you."

[EDITORIAL NOTE.--This series will not be continued in our next
issue.]

* * * * *

"MUSICAL.

1916 car, nearly new, two-seater body, hood, screen, complete,
L13."--_Provincial Paper_.

At that price it probably would be "musical."

* * * * *

"The latest telegrams from Berlin state that the Spartacus
(Extremist) leaders are in extremis."--_Sunday Paper_,

But, confound it, that's their element.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Sergeant_. "ONLY ONE BUTTON DECENTLY CLEAN. AND I
SUPPOSE YOU MANAGED TO GET THAT ONE BRIGHT BY RUBBIN' OF IT AGAINST
THE CANTEEN COUNTER."]

* * * * *

A MILITARY EDUCATIONAL PROBLEM.

Dear Mr. Punch,--I write to ask your advice. As you know, the Army
Council in its wisdom decreed that the Army, before being demobilised,
must be educated. I have been chosen as one of the Educators.

My efforts to lead the Army into the paths of light and learning were
crowned with success until in an evil moment I undertook to teach
Private Goodbody. This genial ornament of our regimental sanitary
squad is especially anxious to plumb the mysteries of arithmetic.
When he had, as I thought, finally mastered the principle that if you
borrow one from the shillings' column you must pay it back in the
pounds' column, I set him the following sum:--

"Supposing you owed the butcher sixteen shillings and three pence
halfpenny and took a pound note to pay him with, how much change ought
he to give you?"

Private Goodbody scratched his head for several minutes and at last
decided that he did not know.

"But come, Goodbody," I urged, "surely it'