ed
that Mr. SMILLIE contemplates engaging him for Sir ROBERT HORNE.

* * *

Whatever else happens, somebody says, the public must hang together. But
what does he think we do in a Tube?

* * *

"Primroses have been gathered at Welwyn," says _The Evening News_. As even
this seems to have failed we think it is time to drop these attempts to
draw the POET LAUREATE.

* * *

Glasgow licensees are being accused of giving short whisky measure. It is
even said that in some extreme cases they paint the whisky on the glass
with a camel-hair brush.

* * *

Mice, says Mrs. GREIVE, of Whins, hate the smell of mint. So do lambs.

* * *

"Coal strike or no coal strike," says _The Daily Mail_, "the Commercial
Motor Exhibition at Olympia will not be postponed." This is the dogged
spirit that made England what it used to be.

* * *

Orpheus of old, an American journal reminds us, could move stones with his
music. We have heard piano-players who could move whole families; but this
was before the house shortage.

* * *

The National Association of Dancing Masters has decided to forbid "the
cockroach dive" this year. Our advice to the public in view of this
decision is to go about just as if nothing serious had happened.

* * *

A large party of American University students are on a visit to
Switzerland. It is satisfactory to know that the Alps are counted every
morning and all Americans searched before they leave the country.

* * *

"The English house would make an ideal home," says an American journal.
Possibly, if people only had one.

* * *

Three statues have been stolen in one week from Berlin streets. It is now
suggested that the London police might be taken off duty for one night in
order to give the thief a sporting chance.

* * *

It is not true, says an official report, that Scottish troops are being
sent to Ireland. We are pleased to note this indication that the bagpipes
should only be used in cases of great emergency.

* * *

"What does the Mexican President stand for?" asks _The New York Globe_.
Probably because the Presidential chair is so thorny.

* * *

The Dublin County authorities have decided to release from their asylums
all but the most dangerous lunatics. We are assured that local conditions
in no way justify this discrimination.

* * *

A jury of children has been empanelled in Paris to decide which of the toys
exhibited at the Concours Lupine is the most amusing. We underst