it was a nice-sounding name, and the one she intended to
address him by in general conversation.

COLLUMPSION--as her papa.

PHIPPS--because she had had a dream in which a number of bags or gold were
marked P.H.I.P.P.S.; and

APPLEBITE--as a matter of course.

(Objected to by Mrs. Waddledot, for--nothing in particular, and by
Agamemnon on the score of economy. The heir being certain to employ a
lawyer, would be certain to pay an enormous interest in that way alone.)

Friends were consulted, but without any satisfactory result; and at length
it was agreed that the names should be written upon strips of paper and
drawn by the nominees. The necessary arrangements being completed, the
three proceeded to the ballot.

Mrs. Waddledot drew Isaac.
Agamemnon drew Roger de Dickey.
Mrs. Applebite drew Phipps.

As a matter of course everybody was dissatisfied; but with a "stern
virtue" everybody kept it to themselves, and the heir was accordingly
christened Isaac Roger de Dickey Phipps Applebite.

Old John soon realised Agamemnon's fears of Mrs. Waddledot's selection,
for, whether the patronym of the Norman invader was more in accordance
with his own ideas of propriety, or was more readily suggestive to his
mind of the infant heir, he was continually speaking of little master
Dicky; and upon being remonstrated with upon the subject promised
amendment for the future. All, however, was of no use, for John jumbled
the Phipps, the Roger, the Dickey, and the De together, but always
contriving most perversely to

[Illustration: "PUT THE CART BEFORE THE HORSE."]

* * * * *

A SCANDALOUS REPORT.

We are requested to contradict, by authority, the report that Colonel
Sibthorp was the Guy Fawkes seen in Parliament-street. It is true that a
deputation waited upon him to solicit him to take the chair on the 5th of
November, but the gallant Colonel modestly declined, much to the
disappointment of the young gentlemen who presented the requisition; so
much so indeed, that, after exhausting their oratorical powers, they
slightly hinted at having recourse to

[Illustration: PHYSICAL FORCE.]

* * * * *

"ROB ME THE EXCHEQUER, HAL."

No wonder Smith Exchequer Bills,
Should have a _taste_ for gorging,
For since the work the pocket fills,
What _Smith_'s averse to _forging_?

* * * * *

THE FIRE AT TH