edly on the floor with a large tray of sundries in his
lap, the result of which was, according to the following

OFFICIAL RETURN,

Two decanters starred;
One salt-cellar smithereened;
Four tumblers cracked uncommonly;
An extra waiter many bruises, and fractured pantaloons.

The day after a party is certain to be a sloppy day; and as the
street-door is constantly being opened and shut, a raw, rheumatical wind
is ever in active operation. Both these miseries were consequent upon the
Applebite festivities, and Agamemnon saw a series of catarrhs enter the
house as the rout-stools made their exit. He was quite right; for the next
fortnight neck-of-mutton broth was the standard bill of fare, only varied
by tea, gruel, and toast-and-water.

There is no evil without its attendant good; and the temporary
imprisonment of the Applebite family induced them to consider the
propriety of naming the infant heir, for hitherto he had been called "the
cherub," "the sweet one," "the mother's duck of the world," and "daddy's
darling." Several names had been suggested by the several friends and
relatives of the family, but nothing decisive had been agreed to.

Agamemnon wished his heir to be called Isaac, after his grandfather, the
member for Puddingbury, "in the hope," as he expressed himself, "that he
might in after years be stimulated to emulate the distinguished talents
and virtues of his great ancestor." (Overruled by Mrs. Waddledot, Mrs.
Applebite, and the rest of the ladies. Isaac declared vulgar, except in
the case of the member for Puddingbury.)

Mrs. Waddledot was anxious that the boy should be christened Roger de
Dickey, after her mother's great progenitor, who was said to have come
over with William the Conqueror, but whether in the capacity of a lacquey
or a lord-in-waiting was never, and perhaps never will be, determined.
(Opposed by Agamemnon, on the ground that ill-natured people would be sure
to dispense with the De, and his heir would be designated as Roger Dickey.
In this opinion Mrs. Applebite concurred.)

The lady-mother was still more perplexing; she proposed that he should be
called--

ALBERT (we give her own reasons)--because the Queen's husband was so
named.

AGAMEMNON--because of the alliteration and his papa.

DAVIS--because an old maiden lady who was independent had said that she
thought it a good name for a boy, as her own was Davis.

MONTAGUE--because