d showed the women a new
tidy she had worked for the heathen, with a motto on it which Pa had
taught her: 'A contrite heart beats a bob-tailed flush,'--and Pa had
talked to the men about a religious silver mine he was selling stock in,
which he advised them as a friend to buy for the glory of the church, they
all went in the back parlor and the minister lead in prayer. He
got down on his knees right under the parrot's cage, and you'd a dide to
see Polly hang on to the wires of the cage with one foot, and drop an
apple core on the minister's head. Ma shook her handkerchief at Polly, and
looked sassy, and Polly got up on the perch, and as the minister got
warmed up and began to raise the roof, Polly said, 'O, dry up.' The
minister had his eyes shut, but he opened one of them a little and looked
at Pa. Pa was tickled at the parrot, but when the minister looked at Pa as
though it was him that was making irreverent remarks, Pa was mad.

"The minister got to the 'amen,' and Polly shook hisself and said 'What
you giving us?' and the minister got up and brushed the bird seed off his
knees, and he looked mad. I thought Ma would sink with mortification, and
I was sitting on a piano stool looking as pious as a Sunday school
superintendent the Sunday before he skips out with the bank's funds; and
Ma looked at me as though she thought it was me that had been tampering
with the parrot. Gosh, I never said a word to that parrot, and I can prove
it by my chum.

"Well, the minister asked one of the sisters if she wouldn't pray, and she
wasn't engaged, so she said with pleasure, and she kneeled down, but she
corked herself, cause she got one knee on a cast-iron dumb bell that I had
been practising with. She said 'O my,' in a disgusted sort of a way, and
then she began to pray for the reformation of the youth of the land, and
asked for the spirit to descend on the household, and particularly on the
boy that was such a care and anxiety to his parents, and just then Polly
said 'O, pull down your vest.' Well, you'd a dide to see that woman look
at me. The parrot cage was partly behind the window curtin, and they
couldn't see it, and she thought it was me. She looked at Ma as though she
was wondering why she didn't hit me with a poker, but she went on, and
Polly said 'wipe off your chin,' and then the lady got through
and got up, and told Ma it must be a great trial to have an idiotic child,
and then Ma she was mad, and said it wasn't half so