on offered be a dillygate fr'm Paryguay callin' f'r immeejit
disarmamint, which is th' same, Hinnissy, as notifyin' th' Powers to
turn in their guns to th' man at th' dure. This was carrid be a very
heavy majority. Among those that voted in favor iv it were: Paryguay,
Uryguay, Switzerland, Chiny, Bilgium, an' San Marino. Opposed were
England, France, Rooshya, Germany, Italy, Austhree, Japan, an' the
United States.

"This was regarded be all present as a happy auggry. Th' convintion thin
discussed a risolution offered be th' Turkish dillygate abolishin' war
altogether. This also was carried, on'y England, France, Rooshya,
Germany, Italy, Austhree, Japan, an' th' United States votin' no.

"This made th' way clear f'r th' discussion iv th' larger question iv
how future wars shud be conducted in th' best inthrests iv peace. Th'
conference considhered th' possibility iv abolishin' th' mushroom bullet
which, entherin' th' inteeryor iv th' inimy not much larger thin a
marble, soon opens its dainty petals an' goes whirlin' through th'
allyminthry canal like a pin-wheel. Th' Chinese dillygate said that he
regarded this here insthrumint iv peace as highly painful. He had an
aunt in Pekin, an estimable lady, unmarried, two hundhred an' fifty
years iv age, who received wan without warnin' durin' th' gallant riscue
iv Pekin fr'm th' foreign legations a few years ago. He cud speak with
feelin' on th' subjick as th' Chinese army did not use these
pro-jictyles but were armed with bean-shooters.

"Th' English dillygate opposed th' resolution. 'It is,' says he, 'quite
thrue that these here pellets are in many cases harmful to th'
digestion, but I think it wud be goin' too far to suggest that they be
abolished ontil their mannyfacther is betther undherstud be th' subjick
races,' he says. 'I suppose wan iv these bullets might throw a white man
off his feed, but we have abundant proof that whin injicted into a black
man they gr-reatly improve his moral tone. An' afther all, th'
improvemint iv th' moral tone is, gintlemen, a far graver matther thin
anny mere physical question. We know fr'm expeeryence in South Africa
that th' charmin' bullet now undher discussion did much to change
conditions in that enlightened an' juicy part iv his Majesty's domains.
Th' darky that happened to stop wan was all th' betther f'r it. He
retired fr'm labor an' give up his squalid an' bigamious life,' he says.
'I am in favor, howiver, iv restrictin' their use