a cucumber.
Can a little 'un like me, your own child, don't you see, such a smart
pioneer as are _you_ cumber?
You, the modern Theseus? Where's your Ariadne? Oh, I know you are cool,
and clever.
Yet I feel a doubt. When _shall_ we get out?--which I _can't_ go on
wandering for ever!

_Mazemaster loquitur_:--

Poor little man! Yes, I _had_ a plan, and a perfectly plain one, too, boy;
But--I fear--for a moment--I've--lost the clue! Ah! I'm awfully sorry for
_you_ boy!
You have been on your feet for a precious long time, and all this
roundaboutation,
_Is_ "_plusquam_-Thucydidean," perhaps, and at any rate mean aggravation.
But you'll please understand I'm a very "cool hand;" there's abundance of
"humour" about me,
And though for a jiffy I _seem_ at a loss, don't you come for to go for to
doubt me.

'Tis most complicated, this Miz-Maze! I've stated the clue I've let slip
for a moment,
And LABBY, no doubt, and his henchmen, will shout and indulge in invidious
comment:
The _Times_, too, may gird, and declare 'tis absurd not to know _one's own
Labyrinth_ better.
The _Times_ is my friend, but a trifle too fond of the goad and the scourge
and the fetter;
You really can't rule the whole civilised world with the aid of the whip
and the closure;
Though I _should_ enjoy--but no matter, my boy, let us try to maintain our
composure!
_When shall we get out?_ That's a matter of doubt, cross-hedges my pathway
still chequer,
The clue I've let slip, but you just take my tip; we'll get clear--if you
keep up your pecker!

* * * * *

CHANGE FOR THIRTY-FIVE SHILLINGS.

There is a singular directness of purpose in the following
advertisement which appears in the _Daily News_:--

REPORTER (27), now on Weekly, WANTS CHANGE. 35s.

The advertiser not only wants change, but he mentions the exact sum.
It seems odd. One often wants change for a sovereign, and even oftener
wants the sovereign itself. But what precise coin a man hands you when
he wants thirty-five shillings change is not quite clear.

* * * * *

[Illustration: IN A MAZE.

MASTER LAND BILL. "OH, MR. BALFOUR, I'M _SO_ TIRED!"

MR. B. "CHEER UP, LITTLE MAN! NEXT TURN TO THE RIGHT,--AND I HOPE WE SHALL BE
OUT OF IT!!"]

* * * * *

[Illustration: _D