ctious, "the
compliments"?

"No, no, my dear boy. I mean in what a fellow told me outside just
now--that some burglars broke into your studio last night, and carried off
all your canvasses--a lie, of course!"

"Oh, _that_?" said TICKLER, "that's true enough--they left nothing behind
'em but the beastly frames!"

"Then what on earth----?" began the other, in perplexity, for another group
was just coming up, beaming with an ecstasy that demanded the relief of
instant expression.

"Well--er--fact is," explained poor TICKLER, in an undertone, "I _did_
think of shutting the studio up and getting away somewhere--but my wife
wouldn't hear of it, you know; said it would be such a pity to have had all
the expense and trouble for nothing, and didn't believe the mere absence of
pictures would make any particular difference. And--er--I'm bound to say
that, as you can see for yourself, it _hasn't_!"

And even as he spoke, he had to resign himself once more to a farewell
burst of positively fulsome appreciation.

* * * * *

THE KING AND THE CLOWN.

[Illustration: PAYNFUL PROCEEDINGS; OR, AFTER THE PANTOMIME'S OVER.

[See _Times_ Report, Friday last, April 1st, "All Fools' Day."]]

KING HERBERT CAMPBELL THE FIRST, and HARRY PAYNE, the Clown, were sitting
together, quaffing, after hours, and when work was done, just as in the
good old times was the wont of _The King and the Cobbler_, or _The King and
the Miller_. To them entered a Constable, intent on duty, and no respecter
of persons. Often had he seen the Clown maltreat a policeman on the stage,
nay, had seen him unstuff him, cut his head off and blow him limb from limb
from a gun, and then put him together again; the only mistake being that
the unfortunate official's head was turned the wrong way. So this
Constable, too, looking backwards, as had done the poor pantomimic
policeman, remembered all the slights, insults, and injuries, publicly
inflicted on his cloth for many years, and now rejoiced--Ha! ha!--at last
at having the Clown, the original JOEY, nay, the last of the JOEYS, in his
grasp.

Poor KING HERBERT the Merry Monarch the Constable pitied, but still
"constabulary duty must be done," as he had heard sung; and remembering
that my Lord Chief Justice, in days gone by, had sent off the Heir Apparent
to prison, so now he the Constable, in the name of the Law, would hale KING
HERBERT before the Magistrate. So King and Clown were had u