been in and approximately how long she had been in each
one. She claimed that at first it "seemed strange." "I did
not eat, I did not want to eat, I used to tell them to
poison me and that I wanted to die, I was _disgusted_, I
thought I would never go home." She also says she felt
_angry_, wanted to kill herself. She bit and scratched
"because I was nervous." She remembered talking about
Harry, "I said I was in love with him, I thought I wanted
to die because I could not have him." She also talked of
having been _stubborn_. Sometimes she felt like running to
the river. She also claimed she imagined people were false
to her.

In one of the wards she said she thought people were there
on her account, were waiting for her death. She did not
care for a time whether she died or not. She knew she tried
to choke herself occasionally. Asked how she behaved, she
first said she was quiet. (Were you not restless?) "I used
to get tired and have backache and roll around in bed." She
also felt like running away sometimes, wanted to get out of
bed and wanted to walk about. (What about going to the
river?) "I used to say that." She claimed not to have been
mixed up at any time and to remember everything. Remarkable
is the fact that she claimed she _did not worry at all_,
"_I felt I was lost and would not worry._ I used to worry
at home and at Dr. M.'s (the private sanatorium) but not
here. Here I never worried, I did not care where I went."
She said she did not talk because she was bashful in the
presence of doctors, sometimes she felt afraid of them,
afraid they would kill her, put poison in her food when
they fed her. "When my people came, I said I did not want
to live, wanted to kill myself. I used to cry." Again asked
why she did not talk, she admitted she really did not know.
Once she said she was bashful because she soiled her bed.
She did not want to go to the closet because she was afraid
of the nurse. She denied hearing voices.

In addition to the activity incidental to her attempts at self-injury,
this patient showed an unusual degree of resistiveness and with this
some affect, for she appeared to be irritated and at times moaned. Still
more unusual were the appearances of delusions not associated with
death but wi