nd each belaying pin;
Come stir your stumps, and spike the pumps,
Or more will be coming in!'

"They stirred their stumps, they spiked the pumps,
They spliced the mizzen brace;
Aloft and alow they worked, but oh!
The water gained apace.

"They bored a hole above the keel
To let the water out;
But, strange to say, to their dismay,
The water in did spout.

"Then up spoke the Cook, of our gallant ship,
And he was a lubber brave:
'I have several wives in various ports,
And my life I'd orter save.'

"Then up spoke the Captain of Marines,
Who dearly loved his prog:
'It's awful to die, and it's worse to be dry,
And I move we pipe to grog.'

"Oh, then 'twas the noble second mate
What filled them all with awe;
The second mate, as bad men hate,
And cruel skipper's jaw.

"He took the anchor on his back,
And leaped into the main;
Through foam and spray he clove his way,
And sunk and rose again!

"Through foam and spray, a league away
The anchor stout he bore;
Till, safe at last, he made it fast
And warped the ship ashore!

"'Taint much of a job to talk about,
But a ticklish thing to see,
And suth'in to do, if I say it, too,
For that second mate was me!"

_Such was the tale that was told to me
By that modest and truthful son of the sea,
And I envy the life of a second mate,
Though captains curse him and sailors hate,
For he ain't like some of the swabs I've seen,
As would go and lie to a poor marine._

_James Jeffrey Roche._

THE CONVERTED CANNIBALS

Upon an island, all alone,
They lived, in the Pacific;
Somewhere within the Torrid Zone,
Where heat is quite terrific.
'Twould shock you were I to declare
The many things they did not wear,
Altho' no doubt
One's best without
Such things in heat terrific.

Though cannibals by birth were they,
Yet, since they'd first existed,
Their simple menu day by day
Of such-like things consisted:
Omelets of turtle's eggs, and yams,
And stews from freshly-gathered clams,
Such things as these
Were,--if you please,--
Of what their fare consisted.

But after dinner they'd converse,
Nor did their topic vary;
Wild tales of gore they would rehearse,
And talk of _missionary_.
They'd gaze upon each other's joints,
And indicate the tender points.
Said one: "For us
'Tis dangerous
To _think_ of _missionary_."

Well, on a day, upon the shore,