(Said I to myself--said I),
Or assume that the witnesses summoned in force
In Exchequer, Queen's Bench, Common Pleas, or Divorce,
Have perjured themselves as a matter of course
(Said I to myself--said I!).

In other professions in which men engage
(Said I to myself said I),
The Army, the Navy, the Church, and the Stage
(Said I to myself--said I),
Professional licence, if carried too far,
Your chance of promotion will certainly mar--
And I fancy the rule might apply to the Bar
(Said I to myself--said I!).

(Exit Lord
Chancellor.)

(Enter Iolanthe)

STREPH. Oh, Phyllis, Phyllis! To be taken from you just as
I was on the point of making you my own! Oh, it's too much--it's
too much!
IOL. (to Strephon, who is in tears). My son in tears--and on
his wedding day!
STREPH. My wedding day! Oh, mother, weep with me, for the
Law has interposed between us, and the Lord Chancellor has
separated us for ever!
IOL. The Lord Chancellor! (Aside.) Oh, if he did but know!
STREPH. (overhearing her). If he did but know what?
IOL. No matter! The Lord Chancellor has no power over you.
Remember you are half a fairy. You can defy him--down to the
waist.
STREPH. Yes, but from the waist downwards he can commit me to
prison for years! Of what avail is it that my body is free, if my
legs are working out seven years' penal servitude?
IOL. True. But take heart--our Queen has promised you her
special protection. I'll go to her and lay your peculiar case
before her.
STREPH. My beloved mother! how can I repay the debt I owe
you?

FINALE--QUARTET.

(As it commences, the Peers appear at the back, advancing unseen
and on tiptoe. Lord Mountararat and Lord Tolloller lead Phyllis
between them, who listens in horror to what she hears.)

STREPH. (to Iolanthe). When darkly looms the day,
And all is dull and grey,
To chase the gloom away,
On thee I'll call!

PHYL. (speaking aside to Lord Mountararat). What was that?

LORD MOUNT. (aside to Phyllis).