at I should be able to cross-examine all witnesses until they
could not stand on one leg. From some private motives of his own, he
sought to overcome my determination, hinting that, as my calling and
election to the Bar were not yet an ancient history, I might not possess
sufficient experience; and moreover that, by appearing in barristerial
garbage, I should infallibly forfeit the indulgence shown by a judge to
ordinary litigants; to which I responded by pointing out that I was a
typical Indian in the matter of legal subtlety and ready-made wit, and
that, if not capable of conducting my _own_ case, how, then, could I be
fit to undertake a logomachy for any third parties? finally, that it is
proverbially unnecessary to keep a dog when you are equally proficient
in the practice of barking yourself.

Whereupon, silenced by my _a fortiori_ and _reductio ad absurdum_, he
gave way, saying that it was my own affair, and, anyhow, there would be
plenty of time to consider such a matter, since the plaintiff might not
choose to do anything further till after the Long Vacation, and we could
easily postpone the hearing of the action until the Midsummer of next
year.

I, however, earnestly protested that I did not wish so procrastinated a
delay, as I desired to make my forensic _debut_ at the earliest possible
moment, and urged him to leave no stone unturned to get the job finished
by November at least, suggesting that if we could ascertain the name
and address of the judge who was to try the case, I might call upon him,
and, in a private and confidential interview, ascertain the extent of
his disposition in my favour, and the length of his foot.

To which Mr SMARTLE replied that he could not recommend any such
tactics, as I should certainly ascertain the dimensions of the judicial
foot in a literal and painful manner.

Now I must conclude with a livelier piece of intelligence: I am now in
receipt of the wished-for invitation to visit the ALLBUTT-INNETT family
at the elegant mansion (or--to speak Scottishly--"manse") they have
hired for a few weeks in the savage and romantic mountains of Ayrshire,
N.B.

Mrs A.-I. wrote that there is no shooting attached to the manse, but
several aristocratic friends of theirs own moors in the vicinity, and
will inevitably invite them and their visitors to sport with them, so
that, as she believed I was the keen sportsman, I had better bring my
gun.

Alack! I am not the happy possessor of any