"hunt-the-slipper" and "hide-and-seek" are
not altogether free from the competitive taint. But an excellent
game is open to him in "patience," while there is no pastime more
indicative of the true Communistic spirit than "ring-a-ring o' roses,"
so long as proper care be taken that at the last "tishu" all the
players collapse simultaneously.

* * * * *

[Illustration: HOMAGE FROM THE BRAVE.

"OLD CONTEMPTIBLE" (_to Member of the Royal Irish Constabulary_).
"WELL, MATE, I HAD TO STICK IT AGAINST A PRETTY DIRTY FIGHTER, BUT
THANK GOD I NEVER HAD A JOB QUITE LIKE YOURS."]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

_Monday, May 10th._--But for the presence of a handful of Irish Peers
and of Sir EDWARD CLARKE (looking little older than when he pulverised
GLADSTONE'S second Home Rule scheme in 1893) you would never have
thought that this was the first day in Committee of the Bill "for
the better government of Ireland." The Ulstermen were on duty in full
force, but the bench on which the Nationalists are wont to sit was,
like their beloved country, "swarming with absentees."

[Illustration: HARLEQUIN'S OFFENSIVE.

LORD HUGH CECIL.]

Lord HUGH CECIL, like _Harlequin_, smote everyone impartially, one
of his most telling strokes being the remark that the PRIME MINISTER
could not distinguish between the art of winning an election and the
art of governing a country; but otherwise his performance was about on
a par with that of Mr. JACK JONES, who spoke against the Amendment
and voted for it. Mr. BONAR LAW'S declaration that the Bill, however
unacceptable to Ireland at the moment, furnished the only hope of
ultimate settlement, coupled with the Ulster leader's promise that,
much as he loathed the idea of a separate Parliament, he would work
it for all he was worth, carried the day. Mr. ASQUITH'S Amendment was
knocked out by 259 to 55.

In subsequent Amendments other Members attempted to emphasise the idea
of ultimate union by calling the statutory bodies "Councils" instead
of "Parliaments," and by setting up a single Senate to control them
both. But they did not meet with acceptance. Captain ELLIOTT thought
the first as absurd as the idea that you could make two dogs agree
by chaining them together, and Mr. LONG dismissed the second with the
remark (which shows how rapidly his political education has advanced
since the Parliament Act) that he was in great doubt as to