anaesthetic of memory.

Never question him about his past love affairs. It is not the women he
_has loved_, but those he _has not yet loved_, who will bother you.

Never fling your old flames in his face. If you do he will soon cease to
be jealous of the men you "might have married" and begin to _envy_ them.

Never accuse him of being less ardent than he was before he married you.
Many a husband would never discover that he was no longer madly in love,
if his wife did not keep constantly reminding him of it.

Never chide him for the same fault more than once.

A man can become so accustomed to the thought of his own faults that he
will begin to cherish them as charming little "personal
characteristics."

Never refer to your own defects. A man always accepts a woman at her own
valuation; and he doesn't prize anything that advertises herself as a
"second."

Never laugh at him. Woman is supposed to be the only human joke and man
the only laughing animal--except the hyena.

Never _cry_ before him. A woman's tears soon wash all the color out of a
man's love; after the third deluge they have no power to move
him--except to move him out of the house.

Never threaten him, scold him nor argue with him. _Act!_ A woman's
arguments affect a man as water does a cat. He simply waits for them to
dry up--and then he goes out and does as he pleases.

Never doubt his word--even when you _know_ he is _lying_. A husband is
like religion: to give you any real comfort, he must be taken with blind
faith.

Never put him on a leash. The dog or the husband that has to be tied is
always the one that eventually has to be advertised in the "lost"
columns.

Never forget that marriage should be a privilege, not a prison; home a
refectory, not a reformatory; and wives jolliers, and not jailers.

[Illustration]

SYNCOPATIONS

A "SOUL-MATE" is seldom the siren who manages to drive a man to
distraction, but just the sympathetic little thing who always happens to
come along when he is _looking for distraction_.

Hanging on a man's word may flatter him, but hanging on his neck merely
frightens him.

Every gay dog has his day--after.

One may be loved forever! It is the vain desire to go on being a
"heart-breaker" after one's flirting days are over that constitutes the
real tragedy of age.

A man regards a woman's love first as an unattainable dream, then as a
boon, then as a blessing, then as a right, then as a matter-of-c