ndia had won the game beyond all doubt and
peradventure.

* * * * *

TO SAINT VALENTINE.

Patron of hearts and darts and smarts
(Which, I suspect, you stole
From Cupid, when the Pagan arts--
Which only edified in parts--
Took on an aureole),

And patron of the robins, who
Select your day to mate
(An act, from any point of view,
Considering what March can do,
Rash and precipitate),

We seek no boon for any friend
(Or lover, if you like);
We only ask that you will send,
If saintly powers so far extend,
On day without its strike.

* * * * *

THE DRUG HABIT--ALARMING DEVELOPMENT.

"The old-fashioned doctor is scandalised at the trade union
movement in the profession. In extreme cases he is said to be
taking his own medicines."--_Provincial Paper_.

* * * * *

Extract from _The London Customs Bill of Entry_, January 25th:--

"Import, s. @ Rotterdam, of Holland, 175 bdls baskets containing
700 strikes."

We always suspected they were of foreign origin; and here we have
"manifest" proof.

* * * * *

From a report of Col. F.B. MILDMAY'S speech:--

"Just as an accomplished horseman exercised ideal control over the
strongest horse with the lightest hand, so Mr. Lowther had shown
such tactful skill in handling them that those who had sat under
him had bus-consciously been disposed to accept his guidance."

_Provincial Paper_.

A praiseworthy effort of the printer to keep up the metaphor.

* * * * *
[Illustration: THE VICTIM.]

* * * * *

THE PATRIOT PIG.

Last Spring I was discussing food with our local doctor. Last Spring
it was quite a favourite topic.

"Now," I said, "we can manage to scratch along somehow. But next
year..."

The Doctor, a hearty man, gave me a smashing blow on the shoulder. "I
have it!" he trumpeted. "We'll start a Patriot Pig Club."

Before he left I found myself an important pillar of the scheme.
Pillars, you know, are the parts of an edifice that bear the weight.
Their function is to be sat upon by the arches. In this case the
arches were Jones the doctor and Perkins the butcher.

The Committee began sitting. I put five pounds into the preliminary
pool and promised them all my pig-swill. I know I did, be